23 Very Tiny Things That Make Your Relationship So Much Stronger Than You Realize

Couple sitting in front of canyon

1. Simply listening to them when they’ve had a hard day, and letting them vent and talk it out, instead of trying to fix it.

2. Showing through your actions that they are your number one priority, instead of just saying it.

3. Holding eye contact when you’re talking to one another.

4. Doing little things (emptying the dishwasher, picking up their favorite candy, writing them a note on the bathroom mirror) that take less than five minutes but that you know will make them smile.

5. Having your own individual lives, but always making big decisions as a team.

6. Saying ‘good morning.’

7. Thanking them for the big things.

8. And even more importantly, thanking them for the little things.

9. Having some stuff in your life that is separate from them – some friends that are just yours, a hobby that is just yours, a favorite relaxation ritual that is only yours.

10. Being okay with the fact that you’re both going to change over time, and learning how to grow around each other instead of apart from one another.

11. Putting your phone away when you can tell they need to talk about something serious.

12. But also putting your phone away when you simply want to spend some quality time together.

13. Remembering little things that they mention offhandedly that they love, and then doing or getting those things for them on a random day in the future, for no reason other than just because.

14. Saying sorry immediately after you’ve snapped or after you realize you’re in the wrong, before your pride has time to get in the way.

15. Forgiving them when they’ve apologized for screwing up, and then moving on.

16. And not bringing up this wrongdoing of theirs sometime in the future during a completely unrelated fight or argument.

17. Taking walks together.

18. Asking them how their day was and then actually listening intently when they tell you.

19. Giving them a compliment out of the blue.

20. Not being afraid to fight, as long as you’re fighting in a way where you’re being respectful, you’re both truly listening to each other, and you always finish the fight with some kind of compromise.

21. And being okay with the fact that sometimes you’ll compromise more, and sometimes they’ll compromise more, and having enough faith in them and in your relationship to know that it always balances out.

22. Making it a priority to celebrate the small things.

23. Reminding them not only that you love them, but that you like them, too. TC mark

Kim Quindlen

I'm a staff writer for Thought Catalog. I like comedy and improv. I live in Chicago. My Uber rating is just okay.

This is me letting you go

If there’s one thing we all need to stop doing, it’s waiting around for someone else to show up and change our lives. Just be the person you’ve been waiting for.

At the end of the day, you have two choices in love – one is to accept someone just as they are and the other is to walk away.

We owe it to ourselves to live the greatest life that we’re capable of living, even if that means that we have to be alone for a very long time.

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