12 People Explain Why They Took Back The Ex Who Broke Their Heart


1. “I knew he was doing it for the right reasons – all that ‘soul searching’ crap. I call it crap because it sounds like a cliche, but I actually really believe in it. We had mutual friends and I knew (through them) that he wasn’t running around on a wild goose chase trying to hook up with everyone in sight. He was just spending a lot of time alone and figuring stuff out. And when he came back to me, he was like a different person, in the best way possible. Still him, but so much more certain.”

–Lana, 28

2. “She cried more than I did during the breakup. I was definitely upset, but she just seemed crushed and so sad. So I knew she wasn’t doing it to be malicious, she was just unsure about us and needed to be on her own. The way she handled it made me love her more.”

–Nathan, 24

3. “Because I didn’t let my world fall apart when he broke up with me. I was absolutely devastated and heartbroken and miserable, but I kept living my life and growing and doing things, and I ended up really liking the person I grew into during that time. And he came back feeling the same way – he felt a lot better and more in tune with himself and we both just felt healthier, to the point where I wanted to see if we could do it again, but better this time. And we did, and we’ve been together for three years since then.”

–Ana, 26

4. “I dated other guys while we weren’t together, and none of them matched up to him.”

–Jessika, 23

5. “I was so much happier with her than I was without her.”

–Ty, 29

6. “A lot of it was my family and friends’ reactions. They were all so sad about our breakup because we really were great together, but she called it off because she thought I wanted to be more serious than her (which was true). But I guess when she broke it off she did a lot of thinking and realized that that was what she wanted too – I left her alone, didn’t pressure her, and just hoped she would feel the same way I did eventually. And when I told my family and everybody that she asked me to get a drink, they all practically screamed. It was a reassurance that they were all just as happy as I was.”

–Kaleb, 27

7. “Because her reasons for breaking up with me were so genuine. She felt like she was ‘almost there’ in terms of wanting to be with me (for life) but wasn’t a hundred percent sure and she thought that it wasn’t fair to me if she wasn’t all-in. And I was crushed, but in a weird way, I am so glad she did that. I just let her go and after six months she came back and said she knew what she wanted and she was sorry. And I believed her and took her back, and now we’ve been married 11 years.”

–Bryce, 41

8. “I missed him terribly and I loved him too much to care about my ego. He was never a jerk during the breakup, he just was struggling with some mental and emotional stuff, so I’m glad he ended things when he did. We’re better now because of it.”

–Patrice, 32

9. “I deserved her breaking up with me. I stopped trying, I stopped being there for her. Her breaking up with me was the best thing she ever did for us. It made me realize I was being a douchebag and I will never take her for granted ever again and when she told me she wanted to be with me again it was the best feeling I’ve ever had.”

–Bernard, 29

10. “My happiest moments were all with him. I was really upset for a while, but he apologized so much and really changed in a good way, and I just listened to my gut. It worked. We got married three years ago. And we’re really happy.”

–Wanda, 34

11. “Didn’t want to lose her a second time.”

–Mark, 30

12. “Because I screwed up constantly the first time around, and she always forgave me and loved me anyway. So I figured I could forgive her for the one time that she was the one who ‘screwed things up’ so to speak.”

–Daniel, 31 Thought Catalog Logo Mark

About the author

Kim Quindlen

I’m a staff writer for Thought Catalog. I like comedy and improv. I live in Chicago. My Uber rating is just okay.

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