(March 21st to April 19th)
Doing a lot of impulsive and adventurous things so that you can hopefully fall out of love with them as quickly as you fell in love with them. Think: skydiving, signing up for a race, adopting a pet, taking up an instrument – whatever gets your mind thinking about anything other than them.
(April 20th to May 21st)
Surrounding yourself with friends and family members who make you feel secure and steady while you’re trying to pick up the pieces. And pampering yourself along the way – bubble baths, staycations, comfort foods, finally buying that one thing you’ve wanted to buy forever, etc.
(May 22nd to June 21st)
Forcing yourself to go out with friends even if you don’t feel like it, because you know that having a good time and being with people who make you laugh is the only way to get your mojo back. You’ll probably also instigate a big change of some sort – from getting a haircut all the way up to moving to a new city.
(June 22nd to July 22nd)
Immediately deleting them from your phone and erasing any hint of them from every social media account you have, because you know that otherwise your brain will not be able to let it go. You’ll also spend a lot of time setting up happy hour catchups and trips to visit friends – because being with the people closest to gives you tons of much-needed energy.
(July 23rd to August 22nd)
Searching for whatever it is that will give you back a sense of control – running, working out, applying for new jobs, purging your room, basically anything that will give you both a sense of achievement and a sense of improving your life.
(August 23rd to September 22nd)
Reorganizing everything in your entire life, not because it wasn’t already in order, but because the act of categorizing, cleaning, and lining things up alphabetically brings you peace and relaxation. You’ll have a hard time at first opening up and talking about your pain with other people, but you’ll eventually get there when your home is so spotless that you have nothing else to do.
(September 23rd to October 22nd)
Flirting with every person you encounter that you’re mildly attracted to, and when that only works short-term, indulging in some more soothing comforts – fresh candles, hot tea, yoga, a new wardrobe, etc. You’ll also find yourself focusing heavily on work in the hopes that your professional successes will temporarily distract you.
(October 23rd to November 22nd)
Removing all traces of them from your life, because you know that if you find out they’re dating someone else, the jealousy might kill you. You’ll also take up a lot of physical activities in the hopes that it will help you burn off some of the frustration and hurt that you’re feeling.
(November 23rd to December 21st)
Spending the first few days (or weeks) convincing yourself that you’ll be totally fine and that this is not that bad; and then, once you’ve come to terms with the breakup, committing yourself to as many work responsibilities and social outings as possible, so that you are busy and distracted from the moment you wake up until the moment you go to bed.
(December 22nd to January 20th)
Diligently following every tried and true piece of breakup advice you’ve ever heard, while also embracing the side of you that is darkly humorous. Particularly around friends, you’ll make a lot of deadpan jokes about how miserable you are, as a way for you to both address your feelings and to make light of the situation as best as you can.
(January 21st to February 18th)
Detaching yourself from the situation as much as possible in the beginning, but eventually talking it out with the friends and family you trust most – since both you know and they know that you have a hard time letting people go unless you can consistently talk through it and work yourself towards a point of acceptance.
(February 19th to March 20th)
Finding a new show and literally bingewatching the entire series in as short of a time as possible – while wrapping yourself in the warmest blankets you can find and eating the best comfort food imaginable.