Be With The One Who Scares You (In A Good Way)


Be with the one who makes you feel like no single day will ever be similar to the last. The one who makes you feel as though you can sense the blood running through your veins for the very first time. The one who speeds up your heartbeat and makes your hair stand on end when you spend time with them, because you can sense your worldview expanding by the second, because you can sense that being with them means everything is going to change.

Be with the one who makes you feel alive, in whatever way that means to you. Maybe it means skydiving, maybe it means bungee jumping, maybe it means cliff diving. Or maybe it just means challenging your brain to understand concepts that are outside of your comfort zone. Maybe it means allowing this person to encourage you to apply for that job that seems out of your league, or to ask for a raise when you know you deserve it, to finally travel to that one place you’ve always wanted to go but that has been put off by a million excuses.

Or maybe it’s even less dramatic than that. Maybe it just means being with someone who makes you go outside on a beautiful day, when all you feel like doing is hiding under the covers and mindlessly bingewatching Netflix for hours. Maybe it just means being with someone who convinces you to join a sports league with them, or a weekly trivia night with a lot of people that you don’t know. Maybe it means being with someone who read a lot of books and inspires you to do the same, someone who makes a conscious effort to stay informed about the world, someone who tries to be kind to those who are cold and warm to those who are judgmental.

Sometimes, being with someone who scares you just means choosing the person who refuses to let you sleepwalk through your days, your months, your years. It means choosing a partner who you know is going to hold you accountable, who can look into your soul and know that allowing your growth to plateau right now would be a waste of so many things that could have been. It means being with someone who absolutely loves you for who you are, who would never want you to change your very essence, and yet still believes you can always push yourself further than the very spot you are in today. And maybe that means windsurfing and scuba diving and a lot of other “daredevil” activities. But maybe it also just means living your own life instead of watching it happen from the couch.

Be with the person who makes you think about them even when you’re not with them. And not just in the typical, daydreamy, head-over-heels type of way. But also because you can’t help but reflect on the conversations you’ve had, the realizations you’ve come to simply from having them in your life, the opinions you’ve traded back and forth and how being with them has caused you to hold more firmly onto some opinions and to completely let go of others. Be with the person who lights a spark in your brain every single day and only makes you more curious about the world and your own responsibility within it.

Be with the one who scares you every day. Because they make you want more for yourself, more for your relationship, and more for the world. Because with them, you’re not sleepwalking. Because with them, you are very much alive. Thought Catalog Logo Mark

I’m a staff writer for Thought Catalog. I like comedy and improv. I live in Chicago. My Uber rating is just okay.

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