12 Men Reveal The Real Reasons Why They Prefer Almost Relationships To Serious Commitments
Why complicate our lives away with arguments, compromises and joint bank accounts? I can make a woman happy without having her decide over what I eat, work or wear. - Michel, 31
By Kiki Yallop
1. “The idea that we should be tied for life to a person is savage. People fail to admit marriage was a social construct until very recently and that love and good sex and passion only happened in extramarital affairs… The same with committed relationships. Why bother to seclude yourself in a partnership that cannot, by definition and by nature, suffice for all your individual needs and wants? We’re lying to ourselves thinking a relationship will be the end of our personal struggles. I personally prefer to stay away from that, and I feel much happier.” – Richard, 35
2. “I’ve been engaged to this girl I met in college. We’ve been together for five years, but things got sour between us and when I got a different job across the country, the decision to drop our engagement felt like a big relief. I’ve been dating women on and off since then but I’d hate to commit to one right now exclusively. I guess it’s easier like that for me at this point in my life” – Chad, 27
3. “My longest relationship lasted for 3 months. I get easily distracted and seeing the same girl every day bores me to death, even if she’s really good in the sack. I don’t like obligations, meeting the parents, that kind of stuff. I guess maybe I’m too young for that.” – Rob, 24
4. “My work requires a lot of travel – sometimes I’ll be in 12 different places in one year. And I love that, I wouldn’t change it for anything in the world. When I was younger a woman I used to date suggested we try long distance, but things got weary between us pretty quick and we separated. I like my life as it is – I won’t lie that sometimes I want more than just sex, but I always warn women about me being someplace else next month” – Gary, 31
5. “Honestly I think it runs in the family. My father got divorced 2 times and only married my mother when he was 50. They had me when he was 57. My eldest brother was a bachelor until he was 41. I’m 33 now and I don’t see myself in a marriage or committed to a woman until much later in life. I like intimacy and deep conversations with a smart ass girl, but that’s all there is. No strings attached, thank you.” – Sasha, 33
6. “Few women take me as I am: unwilling to commit. I prefer spending my time with those women who are also not looking for something definite. That doesn’t make it any less special or memorable. We always spend quality time together.” – Ali, 28
7. “I guess I just want to avoid the part where you get too comfortable with someone or they start nagging you to change. It’s not disrespectful, all I’m saying is let’s spare ourselves the pain of knowing each other at our worst” – Daniel, 30
8. “I like to spend a lot of time alone – women don’t fancy that on the long run.” – Gerry, 36
9. “My ex-wife and I married when we were both 19. We soon realised we were heading to different places in life and got a divorce 2 years later. She’s now happily married to another guy, they have a kid. I stopped looking for someone new and chose to focus on my work, my travels, my book writing. I date women on and off but I’m not interested right now in anything serious.” – Kevin, 26
10. “What people don’t get is we’re not monogamous creatures. Not us men – but humans at large. I’ve hurt many women I guess because they can’t relate to this, so open relationships are the best thing for me. If a woman can’t see behind my reasoning, we don’t have much to talk about” – Adam, 26
11. “I don’t believe in such a thing as an almost relationship. If you’re honest from the start with a girl and set clear boundaries in regards of what you’re having together, no one should get hurt. I’ve had women telling me I lured them into it or lied to them…that’s bullsh*t. It’s your problem if you wear horse blinds…” – Patrick, 27
12. “Spending time with a woman should be fun, playful and sexy. That’s all I’m looking for, and I always let women know it’s gonna be just that from the very beginning. Why complicate our lives away with arguments, compromises and joint bank accounts? I can make a woman happy without having her decide over what I eat, work or wear” – Michel, 31