ESTJ: Tells everyone what’s wrong with their costumes. Wonders why people are running away crying when they’re just offering friendly pointers.
INFP: Arrives at the party wearing a matching costume to their ex in a grand romantic gesture to try to win them back. Drinks themselves into a babbling stupor when their ex’s new date enters wearing the same thing, only a better version of it.
ESTP: Shows up as Tyler Durden from Fight Club. Starts a real fight.
ISTJ: Stays at home. Turns off all the lights. Does not leave candy bowl on porch. Repeatedly mutters, “Damn kids.”
ENFP: Shows up in a space helmet, tutu and Hawaiian shirt wielding a drill in one hand and a tricycle in the other because they wanted to be 18 different things and couldn’t commit to one fully.
ESFP: Sexy nurse. Sexy Girl Scout. Sexy cop. Sexy Nemo.
INTP: Dresses up as their mathematician idol. Impatiently explains their costume to those who ask and is met with blank stares. Becomes increasingly disappointed with the physical world. Goes home early.
ESFJ: Hosts the party. Gossips about all the ESFPs’ costumes.
ENFJ: Forgoes having any fun and stands patiently at the front door of the party, candy bowl in hand, eagerly waiting for any trick-or-treaters to ring the bell. Asks anyone who shows up wearing anything darker than a Disney princess costume if they’d feel comfortable talking about what they’re going through.
ISTP: Just comes for the beer. Throws pumpkins off the roof and TPs the neighbor’s house.
INTJ: Decides to stay sober so they can be productive tomorrow. Accidentally eats six weed brownies.
ENTP: Was too busy saving the world all month to get a costume in time. Barters their way into borrowing yours. You realize once they’ve sauntered off that you got nothing out of this deal. How did it sound so good at the time?
INFJ: Excitedly gets into the very unique, complex costume they thought up back in June. Decides to do a bit of light reading before the party. Falls asleep in costume at 7:30.
ENTJ: Upon seeing that another person has shown up wearing the same costume as them, employs their army of meek friends to tailor their outfit into something unique and beat out their competition.
ISFP: Shows up in a large, “abstract” getup that they’ve been working on in their art studio for months. Repeatedly knocks people over with what appear to be wire tentacles. Wins Most Creative Costume hands down. Still feels inadequate.
ISFJ: Despite just being a guest of the party, splits their time between checking to make sure that everyone is doing okay and darting between the kitchen and snack table to ensure the pumpkin cupcakes and spider web cookies are constantly being restocked.