Dear men,

Do you think men think about sex more than women do? Maybe, but I’ll tell you what, a lot more women think about sex than you might be aware of. Although we don’t just come out and say it like some guys do, there are certain things we associate with your skills in bed from the very minute we meet you. I’m sure you’ve heard the saying, “first impressions are lasting” and that couldn’t be more true! This week I want to clue you in on 5 things women are likely to associate with your skills in the bedroom. I won’t lie, most of these things are influenced by our wild sense of imagination, but still they are some things to keep in mind. So, let’s get into it!

1. Your appearance.

Remember when all women obsessed over the thought of Christian Grey from 50 Shades? One of the things that made him such a fantasy was the way he kept his appearance up. If you haven’t realized what your style of dress (or the lack thereof) does for a woman then start paying closer attention. We are instantly intrigued by a well-dressed man, but when your overall appearance is complete and done just right you’ve got our full attention. Now, what does it mean for your appearance to be just right? It means your dressed properly, groomed properly (yes, including your nails), good-smelling, facial hair well kept–good hygiene. Ultimately, women want a man that can walk into a room and grab more than just her attention… we perceive it very sexy and very manly. If you look the part, we wouldn’t hesitate to daydream about how well you handle yourself in bed.

2. Your grip.

I’m not talking about how you dap your friends up when you see them. For a woman, whether it’s from a hug or a handshake, this association is influenced by the desire women have for a manly man as well. We like to think of your grip as the grasp you’ll take of our body if the time for a sexual encounter ever became real. Eye contact. In control. Firm, but not harsh. Solid, but not hard. Protective, all while being as gentle as we need you to be. YES. YES. YES. This puts a good deal of thoughts in our mind about how you will handle us in the bedroom.

3. Your taste in music.

I may very well be alone in this association, but I’m convinced that a man who listens to classics–like real classics… knows exactly how to handle a woman in bed. I just can’t force myself to believe that someone who listens to ‘trap music’ or ‘one-hit wonders’ day in and day out knows how to properly treat a woman in the bedroom. I just can’t. Correct me if I’m wrong, but many women fantasize about making love while soft and sexy love songs play in the background–not, “Watch me whip. Now watch me nay-nay”. I’m just saying.

4. Your dance skills.

The only thing I love more than dancing alone is dancing with a man who can keep up. Sheesh! I mean seriously, I can’t get over how sexy a man who can hang with me on the dance floor is. I get that all men don’t like to dance, so if you don’t dance because you can’t dance… don’t feel bad. However, if you’re a man who likes to dance, take a woman who loves to dance out dancing and tell me all about what I know will be a fantastic night for the two of you. I’m not talking about knowing the latest YouTube dance moves either; I’m talking about really stepping. Whether slow and steady or a little more upbeat, a confident dancing man is surely a sight to see and the perfect recipe for a wild daydream. I absolutely associate how smooth you can be on the dance floor with how well you dance in bed.

5. Your conversation.

Again, this association is heavily influenced by the desire women have for a manly man. Intelligence is extremely sexy. When you’re able to be mature enough to develop chemistry and carry a real conversation with a woman, I don’t doubt that you can’t create that same chemistry with a woman in the bedroom. Listening and responding is all it takes to keep a woman’s attention in conversation. On the other hand, if you’re all over the place and unfocused during conversation, I presume you’d be the same way in bed.

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So, there you have it! Like I said, most of these things are influenced by our wild sense of imagination, but still they are some things to keep in mind the next time you meet a girl you find yourself interested in.

Feel like I hit the nail on the head? Or maybe you think I’m completely out of my mind. Either way, I want to know how you feel about this, fellas. Share your thoughts with me in a comment below.