25. Why would you do this
When I was 5 my family lived in Indiana for a couple years. We traveled a lot because of my dad’s occupation so every now and then when we’d go as a family we would need someone to housesit.
Naturally when you move a lot it’s hard to have people you know really well to watch over everything you own. I didn’t know the people my parents asked to watch the house (I was only 5), but all I remember was when we got home and opened the door…
The best way to describe it was it looked like we got robbed. Drawers in the kitchen were open and dishes were everywhere; couch cushions were soiled; the bathroom… oh god the bathroom…
But the thing I remember the most was some of my toys were broken, my brand new N64 had playdoh jammed in it, and my favorite picture of me and my dad that I kept by my bed was covered in sharpie.
Never saw that family again, but the memory still makes me rage to this day.
26. What the hell is wrong with that guy
An old friend was in town and called at literally the last minute to say, “Hi, I’m coming over and I need a place to stay!” I thought it was sort of rude, but whatever, we’d always gotten along well.
I made him a bed on the floor because there was only the one tiny twin bed in my room (I was in a dorm at the time) and I didn’t have any clean sheets for it. He then begs to sleep in the bed with me, citing the fact that he had a boyfriend as the reason why it should be okay. Alright, fine, if it’ll shut him up. He also asks to use my towel/shampoo/all my shower stuff. Jesus, okay, whatever, dude.
He then, in the middle of the night, proceeds to wake me up by trying to kiss/fondle me until I shoved him away and told him to stop. Twice. He only gave up because it was starting to wake up my roommate. The next morning he proceeds to inform me that he was having an outbreak of herpes (WHY WERE YOU TRYING TO HOOK UP WITH ME THEN?!), go through my stuff while I’m in the shower, and not take the super-subtle hint when I told him that he needed to get someone to pick him up, like, IMMEDIATELY.
I haven’t talked to him since. What a fucking dick.
27. Why would you badmouth your girlfriend
My roommate and I dated on and off. During one “off” period, she started seeing this sawed off, white trash, misogynistic, gangsta with a bad case of “little man” aggression (let’s call him “Pimple Pimp”).
She had plans with him one and he came over early so she was still getting ready.
Several of my friends were hanging out and Pimple Pimp decided to play to the audience by bad mouthing my roommate to us. After about five minutes of Pimple Pimp calling my roommate a stupid whore in various ways, my friends and I physically threw him out.
28. If you claim you’re in porn, I won’t trust you either
My high school graduation party. Had a bunch of friends drinking having a good time. One friend invites his cousin who claims to be in porn. Guy is all kinds of douche. My sister gets hammered and goes to sleep in the spare bedroom. I notice the guy went missing. I didn’t trust him and thought he might steal from me. I walk into the dark spare bedroom and find the piece of shit groping my passed out sister. I walked into the kitchen and grabbed a large knife. Walked back into the room as my sister was waking up and freaking out. Put the knife to his throat and told him to get out and not come back. Rest of the party was a blast.
