How To Tell If An ISTP Likes You (As Told By 12 ISTPs)

ISTPs are sometimes referred to as the bad boys of the MBTI. It can be difficult to tell what this type is thinking – never mind what they are feeling. Below, 12 ISTPs explain how they behave when they’re interested in someone as more than just a friend.
 Jesse Herzog
Jesse Herzog

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1. “The ISTP would never explicitly state their interest. Ever. We’d hope that the person. pays attention enough to the subtle clues (invitations to do the things that we like to do and interest in the things that they like to do). For the ISTP it’s not an emotional connection, it’s a logical, sensing connection.”

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2. “I am not often strongly attracted to people – it’s only happened a handful of times in my life. But it’s always been to people I can’t stand, and it’s always happened very suddenly. It’s like turning a page in a book – one day they irritate the hell out of me, the next day I just want to be around them all the time. So I guess the change in my behavior must be pretty obvious from the outside: from complete dismissal/disdain to chasing after them. I don’t understand it myself, but there it is. Once I realize there’s an attraction, I’m very straightforward and will ask them if they reciprocate within the next couple of days. Subtleties go over my head, I don’t know how to flirt, not afraid of rejection and hate wasting time.”

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3. “I show someone I like them by giving up my precious free time to spend it with that person instead of at home alone.”

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4. “When I like someone I just continue to hang out and do things with them. I tell them how much I enjoy being with them. I usually flirt and try to make them laugh.”

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5. “I’m extremely non-expressive when it comes to how I feel, and am terrible at small talk and getting to know new people. But if I like someone, it’s hard to not look at them and make eye contact. I’ll also make a real effort to be friendly and talk to the person. I’ll ask a lot of questions to keep the conversation going.”

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6. “I asked my wife how she knew I liked her and she said I would just stare at her every day at work. I like to think I’m less creepy than that but maybe I’m not. Either way, it worked.”

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7. “I can’t always tell when I like someone and when I don’t to be honest. Usually I just go out on dates with someone if they chase me and after a couple of dates I’ll either want to spend more time around them or not. The longer I keep wanting to spend time around them, the longer the relationship goes on for. But usually they need to initiate things.”

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8. “Generally if I initiate conversation with you (especially more than one conversation) it’s because I’m interested in you. But I also might ignore you if I’m interested in you. I don’t want to be too forward or to make things awkward if you don’t like me back.”

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9. “I will suddenly begin actively ignoring you and/or giving you endless amounts of shit about everything. Yes, I am in fifth grade still and no, it has not been working well for me so far.”

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10. “If I really like someone I get kind of protective over them. I don’t even really notice myself doing it at first. But all of a sudden I want to help them out with little things, drive them to work, whatever. That’s usually my own clue-in that I like them.”

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11. “When I like someone I just casually ask them out for drinks after work.”

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12. “I like you if: I make plans to hang out with you, I’m making an effort to learn things about you, you’re following me around everywhere and I’m not actively telling you to get lost. I REALLY like you if: I admit that I like you, I deal with your feelings, I make any sort of future plans with you. And by future I mean next month, not next year. I’m never going to make plans for next year.” Thought Catalog Logo Mark

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