How To Tell If An ISFJ Likes You (As Told By 15 ISFJs)

ISFJs are known for being friendly, generous and attentive. As a result, it can be difficult to distinguish when a member of this type likes you as a friend and when they like you as something more. Below, 15 ISFJs explain how they behave when they are interested in someone romantically.

1. “Although I’m not the type to typically be bold, I purposely put myself in situations where I’m likely to cross paths with the person I like. I try to find little ways to talk to them so that I can engage without coming across too eager. I smile and laugh a lot when they talk.”

2. “Helpfulness and attention to detail pretty much sums up my actions when showing my romantic interest. Constant, subtle actions are the clues. If you’re in the middle of a big project, I’ll offer to help. I’ll even postpone one of my current projects and move you to the top of my priority list. If your project is small enough, chances are I’ll complete it on my own to save you the stress. If I find out you love chocolate, I’ll bake you a plateful of brownies. Want someone to hang on your every word and laugh at all your jokes? You got it! Verbally expressing my feelings isn’t easy. If you look for the subtle clues of helpfulness and devoted attention you’ll find the path to my heart.”

3. “I don’t do it on purpose, but I ALWAYS end up getting into whatever they’re into. And we slowly become closer, cause no way in heck am I going to tell them outright how I feel.”

4. “If an ISFJ likes you they will just tell you how they feel!”

5. “I usually joke with them…at their expense. I also suddenly start to get interested in anything they said they like…even if it was an offhand comment. I also blush uncontrollably. And finally, I’m straight up with my feelings. No games.”

6. “I try my hardest to communicate with them. Simply putting in the effort to talk to someone continually and put the work in to make it meaningful conversation is how I show that I am interested! This can be through being inquisitive about their day, creating inside jokes, asking to study together (even if I don’t need help in the class), grabbing coffee, etc. I believe this is derived from many ISFJs’ love language of Quality Time.”

7. “When I like someone I show them a lot of attention through spending time with them, texting them and sending them links that remind me of them.”

8. “When I like someone I secretly stalk the person and try to get to know more about them. I also tell my most trusted ones about my interest, hoping my interest will get to know about this.”

9. “I let someone know I like them by texting them a lot about their day and inviting them to do fun activities we mutually enjoy.”

10. “If I like you, I will probably get really quiet around you – but I’ll remember little details about what you have told me (e.g. a food you like, your favorite type of music to listen to). You’ll find I incorporate those things into our time together to show you matter to me. I will spend A LOT of time learning the things that matter to you – if you like a TV show I will have gone out of my way to watch all the seasons, if it’s a sport I will look up the terms used in the sport, etc. I will try the things you claim to like even if in the past I haven’t really liked that type of thing. Also note, we do some of these things for people who we care about as friends, but if I like you as more than a friend I spend a LOT more time trying to make sure I can join you in a LOT of your interests. I will try to make sure you are included, well cared for, happy, feeling special and loved – as much as I possibly can.”

11.“I remember little details about them and will do little things for them. I’ll keep track of their favourite foods, music, teams. Also, I tend to be a little extra quiet and shy around them. I want to hear them speak, I want to know how they think and I want to know how they will love.”

12. “I will ask that person a lot if questions to get to know them. I will tend to be really patient and attentive.”

13. “I usually realize I’ve become interested in whatever they’re interested in and then feel a little like a stalker in retrospect. But it’s like, a genuine interest. I want to enter their world. If I find someone interesting, I want to love what they love. But I don’t want to look like a creeper so I try not to be weird about it.”

14. “I’ll start finding small ways to touch them. Like a slightly longer hug than normal or putting my hand on his arm.”

15. “When I like someone I will sacrifice my time to help them. I’ll go beyond the norm to help out with something, or give them a gift for no reason.”