How To Tell If An ESFP Likes You (As Told By 14 ESFPs)

ESFPs are known for being incredibly friendly and outgoing – which can make it difficult to decipher whether they like you as a friend or as something more. Below, 14 ESFPs explain how they behave when they’re interested in someone romantically.

1. “I’m a natural flirt and if I really like someone, I try to learn what type of banter and sarcasm they they like to play with and then use that with them, despite it being a little challenging for me at times (I have a thing for INTJs and they’re definitely a challenge for me, banter wise). How does this person like to be playful? Let me find out and then adapt to that to show them I can play on their level.”

2. “When I like someone I giggle a lot around them, and make more of an effort to spend time with them. I try to come up with lots of fun adventures to do with said person.”

3. “At a party: I make good eye contact, ask questions, joke around, flirt, pay attention to them, find out a hobby that they enjoy that I want to try and ask them to help me learn it. I will definitely share my phone number and try to set up a time to meet again. I know I like someone when I can’t keep my hands still when I’m talking to them… I fiddle with the menu, my drink, my hair, whatever.”

4. “Someone can tell I like them if I’m getting giddy/excited around them, giving them compliments, smiling a lot and giving them my undivided attention whenever we’re talking one-on-one. Also if I am using exclamation points and emojis in text messages.”

5. “When I like someone, I talk with others about the person and check them out – but I also act like I don’t notice them until I grow so frustrated that I ask them out.”

6. “I smile, banter, make witty jokes with coy smiles, engage in innocent, cautious flirting (as in not making myself too available), compliment you subtlety, use more witty humour, look for you to initiate plans that I can work with, spontaneously touch your arm while we’re laughing, ask you about your interests and remember all of your current projects/life events and inquire about them.”

7. “When I like someone, I usually just tell them. Otherwise, I’ll laugh at everything they say, ask lots of questions and just want to spend time with them.”

8. “If I like you I’ll find a way to spend time with you (usually in a group) and do little things like try to create an inside joke with you or give you a little touch on the shoulder, but I try not to send too many signals because I don’t like to be the chaser, I want to be chased. So if you like me you’re gonna have to go for it and see what happens. Good luck!”

9. “I like to chase people a bit. I’ll find reasons to text them, I’ll ask them to hang out. I’ll get a little awkward around them. If they tell me they like a certain book, movie, type of music, I’ll go consume that so we have more to talk about. I’ll be extra touchy.”

10. “When I like someone I will text them individually, suggesting we hang out or referencing a precious conversation. I may also touch their arm or leg when talking and laughing, and talk highly of them to others.”

11. “I make it clear that I like someone through playful flirting. I tend to be very obvious about it.”

12. “When I like someone, I’m full of smiles and sassy banter.”

13. “Since ESFPs can convince themselves they like almost anyone, early on when I’m trying to figure out if I’M even interested, I will touch them in some way… maybe lay my head on them or sit really close next to them. The next step is telling them bold statements to convey interest. If I just met someone and am feeling REALLY bold, I will wink at them from afar. That message always gets across to a guy… Then there’s the element of ESFP where I’m always reading the other person and adjusting these strategies based on what I know about them.”

14. “I’m pretty easy to read. I’ll touch you while I talk to you, laugh at your jokes, and genuinely be interested in what you have to say. I’ll also be smiling whenever I’m around you.”