1. “If I am interested in someone, I tell them – but usually after I’ve observed them to see if they are worth my attention as more than a friend. If not, I’ll just relegate them to my friend list. If so, and it is an optimal time for both of us, I will make my interest known and see how they feel about the situation. From there, we can make a well-informed decision on how to proceed. Of course, it rarely works out this way.”
2. “When I am interested in someone romantically, I don’t always communicate it very effectively… because I’m not super comfortable in that kind of emotional/vulnerable space. But I may playfully tease them in the early stages, and in all stages, I will give them my time. My work and activities are important to me, so if I’m willing to make time for you, either in frequent communication or in person (especially if I SKIP something to devote my time to you), that’s a big deal.
3. “When I like someone I allow them to be close to me physically, I open up personally, and I make time to be with them. I will also work on minimizing the physical distance between us and direct my focus to them in conversation. (This sounds really intense, but I like to think I do this subtly).”
4. “To show I like someone, I get to know more about them – their personality and motivations, etc. I will also want to spend more time together. Flirting, to me, includes touching and sharing deep personal conversations.”
5. “Apart from ‘Hey, go out with me’ or ‘You should ask me out’ (which is my standard mode of operation) I guess the fact that I purposefully direct my attention and spend time with a person is a big sign, because otherwise, I wouldn’t. (Platonic friends seek me out- I only seek out a person I’m truly interested in.)”
6. “It takes me awhile to make up my mind if the girl is someone I would like to spend more time with. Once I have decided, the next time I hang out with the girl I wait for an opportune moment (making sure the mood is right), and with much confidence, I say something like, ‘I like you, and I would love to take you on a date this week.’ Most girls (and probably guys) are initially thrown off by this approach because most people are used to tip-toeing around the idea of romance in conversation. But coming at them directly, they often are relieved that someone called out the elephant in the room, and now we can just move forward with no guessing games. It sets an expectation!”
7. “Usually I go out of my way to spend time with them and really pay attention to what they have to say. Usually my romantic interests are intellectually interesting in some way so it’s not that much of an extra effort.”
8. “I give the unlimited amount of my quality time (only if I really like them and have determined they are worth it). I also do things like leave little notes and little presents, I do act of service like cook, clean, do things they like to do that I probably wouldn’t do on my own but I will do – willingly and happily – for them, because it makes them happy.”
9. “When I’m interested in someone I spend a lot of time with the person (even if its not an efficient use of time), invest in getting to know them, and allow them to be part of my world.”
10. “When I like someone I first must decipher if our futures will line up. I do this by asking them questions and learning more about them and where they see their lives going. From that point I will flirt with them by touching them, spending time with them and focusing my attention on them. Deep conversation is important at all stages of this process.”
11. “I will either compliment their talents and efficiencies, or consult their opinion in an attempt to gain their support on work/personal decisions.”
12. “I show my interest by intentionally inviting them on dates that are clearly defined as to what the date means and where I want the relationship to go so as to remove all ambiguity.
13. “When I am interested in someone I want to find ways to work with them. These may include: being on the same team, volunteering with them, organizing something with them on a committee, etc. Anything to spend more time around them.”
14. “Being romantically interested in the other party does not equate to me confessing. Sometimes, it is really inevitable to be attracted to someone unsuitable to your family’s standards. In my case, if I like someone I can’t be with, I will give them a stern warning and try to avoid them. Sessions to test what’s not going to happen is unnecessary. However, if he persists, then having physical touch as my love language, I, who is still guarded, may become touchy. Meanwhile, if we are compatible, I will march towards that man and confess. Until then, I will be the best version of myself.”