This week on my MBTI Facebook Page, I asked each type to share a personal epiphany they’d had that had significantly impacted their lives. Here’s what 15 INTPs had to say about the particular piece of wisdom that turned things around for them.
1. “Traveling abroad with people other than my family really broadened my worldview. I was able to learn and form opinions without their influence. It dawned on me that there is a world out there and it’s amazing and it made me question just about everything I knew. I wouldn’t have grown as much if I hadn’t made that trip.”
2. “An important realization I’ve had is that I’m not motivated by money — at least not to the extent that culture at large expects folks to be (And banks on us being, as it were.) The idea of money as a goal in itself doesn’t appeal to me. Because I’m in academia, I often wouldn’t mind more money as, say, a means to the occasional splurge — and I do get satisfaction out of being frugal. But when I think of big-picture rewards, it tends to be in the form of recognition or praise, not dollars.”
3. “When I realised that life is not one big relaxing cruise, as much as I might want it to be, and that I actually have to be proactive and do shit (you know, the kind of adulty stuff INTPs are HORRIBLE at) if I want to get anywhere in life. #PrayForINTPs also taxation is theft.”
4. “It’s been important for me to realize that I’m not extroverted – I don’t get my energy from others. In fact, that drains me. I used to over extend myself and burn out, destroy relationships with my constant pull away, because I couldn’t sustain them. Now I know why I did that and I can set boundaries up differently, it’s been very beneficial and life altering with me. I’m the most settled and happy version of myself that I’ve ever been.”
5. “A major realization I’ve had is that positive change in my personal life won’t occur until I stop analyzing all of the possibilities and actually do something about them.”
6. “I can be as talented or smart as my super high achieving friends (usually ENTJs) but I will never ‘achieve’ as much as they do or be as ‘successful’ in the same traditional sense. Why? Because I can’t get my shit together. And I don’t necessarily mean that in a really bad way, but INTPs aren’t meant to be the most organised, gung ho time efficient types out there. We can do it for periods of time when things get busy, but we need time to retreat back into our worlds and do those things which nourish our souls (read books, play an instrument, etc.) or we lose sense of what we’ve always been. To me, that is something I have to periodically remind myself is just as important as receiving all these awards and seeming successful in the eyes of the layman.”
7. “Something I’ve realized over the course of my life is that it is actually sometimes helpful to talk through problems and get an outside perspective. Sometimes just saying the problem or question out loud gives me new insight. Its weird. Also, there is no need and no shame in limiting the amount of choices in my day. Wardrobe, what to order at a restaurant, what to watch on tv, these are decisions I don’t need to make and it frees up my energy for more important things. But the biggest one is that as a woman it took me a long time to realize how much shame I carried for not being a “real woman”. Its hard to not feel broken as an introverted, thinking woman, even though rationally I knew I wasn’t broken. It took leaving the religion I grew up in to see how much religious and cultural messaging I had internalized about how I wasn’t emotional or extraverted enough.”
8. “I live in a country that makes us choose a diploma at the age of 16. That was too much to handle at the time, and I chose the wrong diploma. For the longest while, I felt trapped, but, as it turns out, your life is never set in stone. Life is what we make it out to be and this changed everything for me. I’m now out there doing all I can, learning whatever I can and doing what I do best – learn and apply.”
9. “It turns out Life Experience > Books.”
10. “Learning to lead with my intuition when the situation has an emotional component or is an emotion laden decision. Leading with my logic would get me so wrapped up in all the possible outcomes that, even if I made a decision, it was often the wrong one for me. I learned that following those intuitive leaps that I naturally get as an INTP lead to making decisions that were truer to myself and my purpose.”
11. “An important realization for me has been that I don’t have to like people… my preference to be (mostly) alone is just part of who I am and that’s not going to change.”
12. “What I’ve learned about acceptance: Accept the cards (it is what it is) – You cannot change the past and you cannot change your circumstances, but if you respond wisely to each situation you can create a better future. You have to accept yourself as well. Each one of us is gifted with unique abilities, but also limitations. However, you can choose to maximize your potential by enhancing your strengths, admitting your weaknesses, and asking for help, instead of trying to be someone you are not. You also have to accept others for who they are. You cannot change another person – don’t even try – but you can choose to bring the best out of them.”
13. “That the world is a puzzle and I may always be searching for my fit within that puzzle.”
14. “Normally inspirational quotes don’t do much for me, but one had a large impact on how I manage my brain. “Don’t let your doubts sabotage your actions.” I am very prone to second guessing myself and analyzing things to death to make sure I am making the decision that is logical and correct and so on. Ever since I first heard that quote, I think of it when I get caught in a loop of overthinking. It helps me to break free from the mental gridlock and actually accomplish something.”
15. “It is impossible to be perfect. It is also impossible to release all human bias.”
