13 ISTPs Explain Exactly How To Win Over Their Type

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1. “Give me space. Let me know you want to hang out but do not bombard me with requests to do so. I will say yes when it feels right to me, however do not feel discouraged if I choose more alone time than together time.”

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2. “My initial thought about how to win over my type is to not even try to win over my type. Being genuine is the most important thing to me so if I sense that someone is just acting a certain way or pretending to like something that I enjoy just to win me over, I am immediately turned off by them. Sometimes I just shut down completely. I’d much prefer honesty than someone trying appease me just to spare my feelings.”

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3. “(1) Don’t tell me what to do. (2) Don’t lie to me. (3) Don’t be too serious all the time, it will scare me away. (4) Don’t give up if I seem uninterested at first.”

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4. “I have a strong need to fix the problems of those closest to me, and I know that it can be a little overwhelming at times, especially when you just need someone to listen. So please, for my anxieties, let me know when my problem solving instincts aren’t needed (they probably are) or wanted (that’s fine, I’ll just be making a mental list of things to Google immediately after this conversation, for curiosity’s sake.) Also, I will be personally offended if you take your broken iPhone to a mall kiosk instead of letting me fix it.”

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5. “Be genuinely interested in what I’m saying. Communication is key. No games or bullshit. Since I’m not real chatty being a good conversationalist also key.”

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6. “Appreciate the stuff I like to do. You have to like some of the stuff and do it with me, but don’t do everything with me. Also accept that I’m lazyish and prefer to make fewer dishes that have to wash a sink full of dishes. Don’t make me wash your stupid dishes. And don’t expect a lot of income from me because I’m super happy with 35k a year with a ‘crappy house,’ but fun hobbies, and all the securities that we’ll need.”

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7. “Just be there when I need you and don’t be there when I don’t need you. Do this enough and I’ll be there for you too. And keep the talks real.”

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8. “Show a real genuine interest in me and getting to know and appreciate the real me. Be truly attentive and genuine. Enjoy witty humor and bounce it back just as quickly. Be awed at times. Believe and trust I have a genuinely good heart and intentions. Know that I am harmless overall. Snuggle up to me. Give me a kiss.”

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9. “I appreciate actions over words. So many people have so many good intentions with zero actual follow through. I will gravitate more to someone who says they’re going to do something and then actually does it or will at least make steps towards that goal. Words are usually meaningless to me until I finally see action behind them.”

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10. “Go with the flow and don’t be boring. Also, keep the emotional stuff to a minimum.”

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11. “Just be honest and real with me.”

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12. “I appreciate individuality and I recognize that not everything I love or like to do in this world is something I will share with every human being. I would rather experience everything in life in complete solitude than have to share experiences with someone who was just pretending. I prefer when someone can be who they are without trying to win anyone over, especially me. I find it attractive when people have the guts to say, ‘I actually don’t enjoy this thing that you love, but I’m open to experiencing this with you because I love you, care about you, or just want to get into your pants.’ We already have such a brief window of time in this world, I don’t need to waste it trying to sort through bullshit.”

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13. “I’m looking for someone who is dependable, trustworthy and fun. But I don’t know if there’s any sure fire way to ‘win me over’. It will ultimately just depend on the person and what they are like.”TC mark

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Pick up Heidi’s new book “How You’ll Do Everything Based On Your Personality Type” here.

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