25 Struggles Only INFJs Will Understand

INFJs – Introverted, Intuitive, Feeling Judgers – are the deep, compassionate intellectuals of the MBTI world. Making up just 1% of the population, this type is sourly misunderstood by most other types. They are the philosophical nurturers, the accidental counsellors and the extroverted introverts. In many ways, they are a series of internal contradictions. And sometimes it’s a struggle.


1. Being able to predict with eerie accuracy how a situation is going to play out, but being too polite to tell people that they’re making a mistake… so just keeping quiet and having to watch exactly what you thought would happen, happen.

2. Having zero interest in casual dating in a world that’s obsessed with flings and one-night stands.

3. The consistent, nagging voice in the back of your mind telling you that you’re not living up to your full potential.

4. Having much never met another person like yourself, since INFJs are (a) Only 1% of the population and (b) Usually inside reading a book.

5. The constant struggle of wanting alone time but feeling the uncontrollable compulsion to go make your loved ones happy.

6. Fooling everyone into thinking you’re an extrovert while you’re in public and then confusing the heck out of them when you don’t want to go out tonight because… well, you just don’t want to.

7. When pretty much all of your favorite people are fictional.

8. Not wanting to work for a corrupt, capitalistic society … but also needing to pay rent and eat.

9. When you want to go to sleep but your brain wants to stay up analyzing the great mysteries of the universe.

10. Having such a clear idea of something in your mind that it’s impossible to convey it using words, so you just talk around the concept for hours and end up making everyone more confused than ever.

11. Being just idealistic enough to conceive of a Utopian society but just realistic enough to understand all of the reasons why it could never exist.

12. When a conversation with someone doesn’t unfold the way you meticulously planned for it to in your mind.

13. Being in tune with absolutely everybody’s feelings except your own.

14. “Funny thing – I already watched our entire relationship play out in my mind. It ended in a painful divorce ten years down the road at which point I lost custody of our beautiful Dachshund Aristotle, whom I loved with all my heart. So no, I won’t be available to go out on a second date with you.”

15. Oscillating between revealing absolutely nothing about yourself to others and then revealing way too much and apologizing for it.

16. Actually, feeling the need to apologize for pretty much any emotion or need that you outwardly express.

17. Accidentally creating ridiculous standards for other people in your mind and then being disappointed when they fail to live up to them.

18. Hating conflict but having people constantly come to you with their conflicts.

19. When you finally find the nerve to open up to a loved one about what you’re thinking or feeling deep down – and then they still don’t get it.

20. Needing close relationships in order to be happy, but also needing a lot of alone time in order to be happy.

21. Being a magnet for self-destructive people and then dwelling on their problems ten times more than they do themselves.

22. Being intellectually gifted but also entirely out of touch with the world around you.

23. Being a compulsive people-pleaser in relationships because your partner being unhappy would actually feel worse than you being unhappy.

24. Kind of fitting in everywhere but really fitting in nowhere.

25. When you occasionally remember that the rest of the world doesn’t live life almost entirely inside of their minds – and honestly having no idea what that must be like. Thought Catalog Logo Mark

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