Every Generic White Girl’s Favorite Drink And What They Say About Her

Flickr / The Game

Vodka soda

She never misses a barre class. Her nails are always done perfectly. She started wearing a choker before you did.

IPA BEER

She played soccer all through high school and actually enjoys hiking on the weekends. She’s ~low maintenance~ and proud of it. Her Tinder bio says “one of the guys”.

VODKA CRANBERRY

She thinks college was the best time of her life (and she’s probably right). This was the first drink she ever had and she stuck to it. She owns seven different silver Alex & Ani bracelets.

COORS LIGHT

She was in a sorority in college and five years later, she still lives with her sorority sisters. She hashtags every picture #sisterhood. There’s a beer in every other one of her Instagram pictures. She owns an American flag bikini.

GIN MARTINI

She has a hoop nose ring and wore high-waisted jeans before everyone else did. She did a year of AmeriCorps after college.

old-fashioned

She sews her own pants and proudly owns a 4-year old iPhone. She cuts her own hair, waxes her own eyebrows and doesn’t bother with shaving her legs.

cosmopolitan

Definitely wants to be Carrie Bradshaw. Definitely started drinking because Carrie Bradshaw did. Definitely writes just as tritely as Carrie Bradshaw did.

margarita

Lives in her bikini. Thinks Taco Tuesday is a religious experience.

red wine

Starts a Bachelor fantasy league every season. Has bought SugarBear vitamins at least twice. Leaves Yelp reviews for everything.

champagne

Moved to New York after college. Says she lives in Williamsburg but actually lives in Bushwick. Watches Gossip Girl when she’s feeling down.

moscow mule

Has a Pinterest board for her future wedding even though she’s not even in a relationship. Wears flower crowns once a month.

long island iced tea

Got her first fake I.D. at 15 and hasn’t stopped drinking since. Still gets spray tans. Snapchats every moment of a concert.

bloody mary

Wears Birkenstocks every day. Married young but is somehow still cool. The only make-up she owns is mascara.

gin and tonic

The Cure is her favorite band and she definitely thinks that makes her cooler than you. Has worn the same watch for three years. Yells when she talks.

sex on the beach

Just likes the looks she gets when she orders this. Thought Catalog Logo Mark


About the author

Hadley Spot

Just another 20-something.

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