8 Signs You’re Ready To Love Again

We’ve all been victims of heartbreak. It can be a long, painful, and grueling process to overcome for some. For others, it’s as easy as making another tally mark on their wall of failed love stories. However long the process of healing is, we can all agree that there is always a process. The beauty of the heartbreak process is that we always emerge renewed. We remember the hurt, but in due time we forget how much it stung and we put ourselves back into similar situations again and again.

There are instances when we think we’re renewed and ready to love again, only to find out that we’ve miscalculated. It’s a common mistake and can sometimes put us back into a funk. Here are a few signs to look out for when you feel your heart has mended and you’re ready to love again.

1. You’ve forgiven those who have hurt you.

You’re no longer holding grudges. You’re not looking for a new love to make anyone jealous or to show them that they’re missing out. You’ve forgiven wholeheartedly and you wish the person who hurt you well because you know that true forgiveness will allow you to fully love again.

2. You’re not defined by your love life.

Being single again, especially after a long relationship, can hurt so much. We’re sometimes left feeling void and confused about how to fill the free space and time we now have. When healing approaches, you’re totally fine with being single and staying single if the right person doesn’t come along.

3. You’re okay with the uncertainty that comes with a new love.

You don’t know what to expect and you don’t know the outcome, but you’re okay with that. You’re not in your head about where anything is going, you’re simply enjoying the new experience.

4. You’re content being alone.

You’re not in a rush to start anything new because in your healing process you’ve discovered yourself again. You can make yourself happy and you’re convinced that your happiness doesn’t rely on anyone. Being alone sounds just as good as being in a relationship.

5. You’ve taken time to work on yourself.

Whether it was concentrating on your mental health, your physical health, or your spirit, you’ve improved. You’re ready to let someone in to enjoy the benefits of the new you with you. You can offer yourself stability in these areas, without having to depend on the person you’re going to be with to deal with the parts of you that need work.

6. You’re convinced that a relationship would add on to your already great life.

A new relationship would be the cherry atop the deliciousness that is your sundae of a life. This cherry doesn’t add on very much or take away any of the sweetness. It’s just a plus.

7. You’re open to being vulnerable again.

Dating someone new also calls for letting them see the sides of you that are weak and sometimes ugly. Vulnerability also means maturity.

8. You’re ready to forgive again.

This new person will mess up. They will sometimes hurt you intentionally and accidentally. They may break your heart exactly or worse than the previous person. Knowing that this can happen and being open to experiencing heartbreak all over again means you’re ready to love again.

Fernanda is a native New Yorker who loves tea, fuzzy socks and stories

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