Date Someone Who Loves That You’re Not Perfect

loving the imperfections
New Girl

What if we changed our scheme when it came to looking for love? What if instead of checking to see if the guy or girl at the bar fits the “physical features wanted” checklist in our minds, we focused on how warm their smile is? What if instead of sneakily asking about what they do for a living, you know, to see if they can fulfill our reveries of having an apartment in the city and house in the country, we focused on the things that truly matter? Things like patience, kindness, intelligence and generosity. What if we forwent on having a partner that’s “cool” by society’s standards and we went out with someone passionate about what they do and what they like, no matter how nerdy or quirky?

So many people complain that love is hard to find these days, but I wonder if it’s difficult because we make it difficult.

Think of all the people you’ve said no to a second date. The list of people that didn’t meet all of your standards, or any of them. What if you missed out? I’m not saying you shouldn’t have any criteria, I’m just saying be willing to love someone who isn’t perfect, because chances are there’s someone out there who wants to love you in spite of your imperfections.

Date someone who loves your plain, old brown eyes and doesn’t let you go to sleep angry.

Date someone who enjoys spending time with you, even if it’s just to talk about the boring crap you like while sipping on lattes.

Date someone who sees your little love handles, but kisses them because they’re so cute.

Date someone who is shorter than you, but can carry on an intelligent conversation.

Date someone who pushes you to be a better person.

Date someone who challenges you and isn’t afraid to tell you that you’re wrong.

Date someone who can be serious, but makes you laugh like no one else can.

Date someone who is proud of you and shows you off.

Date someone who tells you you’re crazy for being insecure and then showers you with sincere compliments.

Date someone who doesn’t make fun of your hobbies, but wants to join in on them.

Date someone who isn’t afraid to move forward in the relationship.

Date someone who texts you at all hours, not just at night with a request for nudes.

Date someone who when you say you “need space” will still makes a conscious effort to not leave you alone. He or she knows that “I need space” really just means “hold me close, because I really need this hug right now.”

Date someone who loves that you’re not perfect and give yourself the opportunity to love someone imperfect. Thought Catalog Logo Mark

About the author

Fernanda Calvo

Fernanda is a native New Yorker who loves tea, fuzzy socks and stories

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