100 Brutally Honest Things To Say To Your Ex

There is a moment when silence stops being strong and starts feeling weak. When you’ve spent so long trying to be the better person that you lose track of the fact that you’re allowed to fight back. This isn’t an exercise in bitterness or retribution. It’s an act of defiance. It’s a reclaiming of your voice after someone spent so long teaching you to doubt it. It’s a chance to say the things you swallowed down when you were trying too hard to be peacekeepers.

Every person who’s ever been hurt has felt the itch in their throat. The thing that makes you want to rewind time and finally say the things you should’ve said in the first place. Not so you can open the wound all over again, but so you can sew it up properly this time around. This is it. These aren’t soft words and they’re not meant to be.

If you want to shut someone down when they start to get aggressive, manipulative or when they start to miss the storms they used to cause, you shut it down it. You let your truths speak for you.

Four types of exes, four ways of ending it. Find the one that sounds like you. Speak it for yourself.

For the Manipulative Ex (AKA The One Who Broke You and Called It Love)

When you want to close down the ex who twisted every truth and played victim when you caught them, you don’t argue. You expose. You slice through their manufactured innocence with sentences that don’t leave room for spin. Each one leaves the conversation dead in the water that they’ll try to resurrect.

1. You made me apologize for getting angry at your abuse.
2. You made me doubt my memory so you could manipulate the facts.
3. Every time I confronted you about lying, you made me pay for seeing through you.
4. You didn’t want love; you wanted control packaged as romance.
5. You promised me you’d never hurt me while you were hurting me.
6. You trained me to jump when I was safe.
7. You thrived on my confusion because it made you feel superior.
8. You faked interest so you could keep me under your thumb.
9. You gaslighted me into thinking I was crazy when I could see the truth.
10. You constructed a me that only existed to make you feel good about yourself.
11. You knew what you were doing and delighted in making it work.
12. You never played fair, because you didn’t believe in fair play.
13. You made love a game of snakes and ladders where I was always going to lose.
14. You broke me to pieces, then gaslighted me for being “dramatic” when I was broken.
15. You said I was “too emotional” but I was only responding to cruelty you wouldn’t acknowledge.
16. You lied so casually it was like a habit.
17. You called my compassion weakness.
18. You weaponized my apologies.
19. You didn’t want forgiveness; you wanted me to forget.
20. You played the victim better than any I have ever known.
21. You made me believe “barely enough” was the best I could ever hope for.
22. You didn’t love me; you loved seeing me show you I loved you.
23. You knew I deserved better, which is why you resented me.
24. You made me think loving you was betraying me.
25. You left me with trust issues you’ll never have to justify.

For the Selfish Ex (AKA The One Who Took Until There Was Nothing Left)

When you need to quiet the ex who only recalls what you broke but never what you took, you let them know what consequences sound like. Frigid, calculated, and absolutely inarguable.

1. You always required more…more attention, more understanding, more of me.
2. You never saw how small I had to shrink to fit into your space.
3. You leached me out and called it love.
4. You took all of the goodness I gave and pretended you were entitled.
5. You couldn’t bear me being exhausted because it made you see how selfish you were.
6. You erased my effort.
7. You told me you loved me, but you only loved how I made you feel.
8. You never knew how to say “thank you,” only “finally.”
9. You took my nurturing for granted.
10. You exploited me like a reflection, only gazing when you wanted to see yourself.
11. You didn’t give love, you hoarded it.
12. You told me I was needy because I wanted something in return.
13. You thought compassion was a gift.
14. You weaponized my empathy.
15. You demanded devotion that you never intended to reciprocate.
16. You wanted acknowledgment, not closeness.
17. You needed me to adore you to confirm your importance.
18. You left when I stopped centering you.
19. You co-opted my calm as your escape.
20. You confused my fatigue for apathy.
21. You only loved me when I was easy.
22. You didn’t love me, you loved the image of you that my love reflected.
23. You always came empty-handed, and you took from me like a feast.
24. You called it “love” because “exploitation” sounded ugly.
25. You abandoned me with nothing but lessons I didn’t need

For the Cowardly Ex (AKA The One Who Wanted Love Without Cost)

If you want to shut down the ex who ghosted instead of explaining, who hid behind confusion and timing, never beg for answers. You hand them their reflection. These are the words that make avoidant people flinch, because they expose the truth they’re desperate to ignore.

1. You were afraid to be seen, so you remained small.
2. You kept me near, but never let me in.
3. You made distance seem like dignity.
4. You wanted all the fruits of love, without any of the risk.
5. You were half-there, half-true, and all coward.
6. You avoided depth, for you were afraid to drown in your own feelings.
7. You never expressed what you felt, for that would make it true.
8. You mistook detachment for strength.
9. You could not look me in the eye when things became difficult.
10. You made me beg for communication that you were never capable of providing.
11. You left without a word, for to face the damage would’ve taken courage.
12. You were too coward to fight for anything.
13. You called me “too intense” for you mistook passion for conflict.
14. You wanted love to be easy, so you never had to change.
15. You mistook silence for peace, when it was only avoidance.
16. You never showed up, unless it was easy.
17. You left when I needed you most – and called it self-care.
18. You believed detachment made you noble.
19. You hurt me quietly, which somehow made it worse.
20. You didn’t say goodbye… you simply evaporated.
21. You let me shatter and said nothing.
22. You did not deserve my truth.
23. You were never unkind, just absent, which somehow felt more cruel.
24. You wanted to be loved but not held accountable.
25. You were a ghost, even while you were standing in front of me.

For the Cheater Ex (AKA The One Who Made Love Feel Dirty)

Want to shut your cheating ex right up when they try to make light of it? Don’t yell, make them sit with what they did. These make it clear that cheating isn’t a mistake, it’s a them issue. (Not you, babe.)

1. You looked me in the eyes and lied as if it were nothing.
2. You made betrayal look casual.
3. You took the sacred and made it vile.
4. You turned love into humiliation.
5. You didn’t “make a mistake” you made a choice.
6. You made me question every memory we had.
7. You shattered trust as if it were replaceable.
8. You made me feel stupid for believing in you.
9. You played faithful while practicing your next lie.
10. You turned my home into a platform for your infidelity.
11. You let me cry and still acted as if you were the victim.
12. You blamed me for the attention you couldn’t stop chasing.
13. You showed me what disgust feels like.
14. You turned love into something that made me physically ill.
15. You broke me and then called me bitter for remaining broken.
16. You tried to convince me it wasn’t that bad.
17. You made intimacy feel unsafe.
18. You killed every version of myself that trusted easily.
19. You didn’t lose me you buried me under your lies.
20. You made “sorry” sound insignificant.
21. You made loyalty seem naïve.
22. You shattered a part of me that you’ll never be capable of fixing.
23. You will never know what it feels like to be loved by someone you destroyed.
24. You lied so much that you started believing yourself.
25. You didn’t cheat because you were unhappy, you cheated because you were hollow.