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Dupont Circle
Where Youâll Go: The Mad Hatter or Sign of the Whale if youâve been out of college for less than six months, Eighteenth Street Lounge if youâre trying to be classy, Buffalo Billiards if you want room for activities, Public if you enjoy rooftops that smell vaguely of Shake Shack.
What Youâll Wear: Girls: Forever 21, the less fabric, the better. Guys: Plaid shirts or v-necks, obviously.
Who Youâll Meet: GW ADPiâs most recent pledge class, a guy that canât hold a conversation so he just flashes his abs, 28-year olds reliving their glory days even though you can tell by looking at them they never had glory days.
Bad Decision Youâll Make: Attending upwards of five Sign of the Whale free happy hours before realizing youâd rather pay for alcohol than revisit the establishment, walking into the sausage fest that is Midtown, forgetting the name of the guy you bring home, losing your wallet/phone/dignity.
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Adamâs Morgan
Where Youâll Go: Danâs Cafe to pregame, Jack Rose to meet the bro who almost has his life together, Town Tavern because someone makes you, Madamâs Organ if you want to cram all of your friends onto a ârooftopâ thatâs 8âx8â˛, Grand Central to get hit on by creepy men.
What Youâll Wear: Girls: Upgrade to Zara if youâre going to Jack Rose, downgrade to your freshman year frat party clothes if youâre going to Shenanigans or Grand Central (yes, we know they donât fit anymore, thatâs the point). Guys: Button downs because youâre trying too hard.
Who Youâll Meet: Your high school graduating class, your prom date from one school over who youâll be too drunk to recognize, a nice lady at Jumbo Slice who offers you a bite of her pizza, a newly-21 year old who will likely have alcohol poisoning by the end of the night.
Bad Decision Youâll Make: Waiting until last call to try to hail a cab, eating Amsterdam Falafel and waking up full in the morning, tripping on the sidewalk (why are you wearing heels anyway?)
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U Street
Where Youâll Go: Local 16 for the rooftop, The Brixton for a rooftop thatâs less sloppy but more pretentious, Cafe Saint Ex to relive your basement frat party days, U Street Music Hall to meet your next hipster boyfriend and also 18 year olds.
What Youâll Wear: Plaid (sensing a theme?), a dress from Urban Outfitters, a Nellieâs t-shirt, anything that says âIâm not trying too hard⌠but yeah, it took me over 30 minutes to get ready.â
Who Youâll Meet: A guy that weighs less than you and âtotally liked this song before it was cool,â a new gay BFF at Nellieâs who follows you to the next bar but mostly because heâs into your guy friend, a boy who flirts with you at the 9:30 club until you realize he has under-21 xâs on his hands and you walk away.
Bad Decision Youâll Make: Taking the metro, choosing jumbo slice over the better food options (&pizza, Benâs, Taylor Gourmet).
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Georgetown/Glover Park
Where Youâll Go: George if youâre on the list or âknow someone,â Town Hall/Mason Inn, Rhino Bar and Pumphouse if the phrase âpumphouseâ didnât already turn you away, The Tombs if you want to meet college kids that keep stayinâ the same age.
What Youâll Wear:Â Guys: Salmon shorts and boat shoes. Girls: J. Crew or Lilly Pulitzer, any super-expensive outfit to juxtapose the rail vodka soda youâre drinking.
Who Youâll Meet: Good olâ southern boys who are way too passionate about the SEC, an intern who talks up his job on The Hill but deep down knows heâs irrelevant, a bro yelling âDO YOU KNOW WHO I AM?!â after you spilled on his Sperryâs, a lax player from Gonzaga still talking about high school, people with roman numerals in their name.
Bad Decision Youâll Make: Accepting every Fireball shot youâre offered, admitting youâre a Democrat.
 BONUS ROUND: Clarendon
Where Youâll Go: Clarendon Grill for the band, Mister Days for twice the bros and half the cover charge, Mad Rose if you want to look around and feel better about yourself, Whitlows for mug night and people-watching, Hunan One for liter-beers.
What Youâll Wear: Guys: The bro-iest thing you own. Girls: too much makeup and a statement necklace.
Who Youâll Meet: Suburban try-hards, cover band groupies, a bro passed out on a bench before 1am, a guy that buys your pizza, but then tries to follow you home, someone trying to impress his date by offering you $20 to cut the line into the bar (seriously?), JMU alumni, a 35-year-old guy who runs a hookah bar in Sterling and gives you his business card because he wants you to stop by later.
Bad Decision Youâll Make: Going out in Ballston, Clarendon Ballroom, $10 cover.