To The Girls Who Have “Almost” Boyfriends

I know exactly what it is like to be you. You have a guy right? Or so you think. Maybe you have been “talking” for a while now, days, weeks, months, hell maybe even years. Anyways, what I’m saying is that it has been awhile and I’m willing to bet that the large majority of you have never said a word to him regarding your “status”. Which I totally get, because it would be weird and awkward and you think that its better to not ask and not know at all rather than asking and risking getting what you thought was a functional relationship obliterated into a thousand pieces.

So you sit, and think situational thoughts. Maybe you get to a point where you convince yourself that you are exclusive and maybe that he is such a great guy that he didn’t even feel the need to say anything about it to you because he just assumed that you two are dating because he likes you THAT much. Or, you could think that maybe he will ask you to be his girlfriend one day, it’s coming soon so you shouldn’t worry.

The best part is when your friends ask you how you and him are doing right? And you have to make up some BS excuse or talk about last nights’ hook up and how he made you walk home in the cold all the way across campus at 4 am. Chhyeah. They keep asking and you keep telling and you want to stop because you don’t know if it will go anywhere but you can’t so you begin to call him your “almost” boyfriend. Now the word “almost” is a play because to an outsider it makes it seem like you put him in that category because he is “almost” good enough for you but to an insider they know that the almost means nothing.

He’s your “almost” boyfriend because you don’t know what to call him.

You cant say FBW because you don’t even know if you two are really even friends and acquaintance is a strange term because you two probably are definitely more than acquainted with each other depending on the social setting.

The “almost” seems to be a sense of security for some girls, it gives them a chance that maybe if they stick with it, maybe just maybe it will become real. Truth is girls, guys know within the first ten seconds of meeting you if they are attracted to you. They decide right then and there.

There is a time and a place for everything, and if a guy wants to date you then he will.

There is no such thing as this almost/maybe bullshit. Either you are or you aren’t and that’s fine if you want to hook up with people even though you know you are nothing. But that means you cant call them your “almost” boyfriend, because that does not actually exist. If he is not your boyfriend then he is not, there is no need to put a label on it if there is nothing actually going on. And if you continue to do that because you want a relationship, then girlfriend you do you and move the fuck on. Because if it’s been over eight months and nothing has changed chances are it never will. If you really want to know than ask him.

Almost actually means nothing. Girls, please get it through your head. Trust me I know, I’ve done this multiple times and you only get hurt. Every. Single. Time. And as much as you try to mask your feelings, it does not work. It only makes you beat yourself up inside. You all need to know that you are NEVER not good enough for anybody. So to my ladies with the “almost” boyfriends, do yourself a favor. Call them up right now, and drop them, because in the end those are not the guys that are worth your tears, time and sanity. Save it for somebody who cares, somebody like your real boyfriend.