Why We Need To Stop Thinking We’re “Missing Out” On Life

In a world where socializing reigns supreme, and Sunday mornings consist of proudly posting pictures of your drunken Friday and Saturday night endeavors, what’s a person without a packed social calendar to do? The answer is: breathe. Not every single minute of every single day can be spent with another person: especially if you’re the type to be selective with who you hang out with. Sometimes those days or weekend nights just come along when everyone just happens to be out of town, or busy, or sick and you’re left twiddling your thumbs in your apartment wondering: what do I do?

FOMO, fear of missing out, can come into play in this situation. We sit at home on Netflix, or on Pinterest, or Tumblr, or crafting, or reading, or drinking a bottle of wine alone just thinking about all the fun that other people are having — and you’re not. You somehow feel like a failure because they have achieved a level of socializing that you have not. There are people out there who never spend a Friday night at home alone — they always have something to do — why don’t you? And you can think about all of the reasons that you don’t have as large a social circle, or if there’s any possible way that you can nab an invite to a party stat, but what’s the point?

All that dwelling does is make us unhappy people — people who are under the illusion that every day of our lives needs to be dedicated to fun, just because other people are having it. Half the time we don’t go out it’s because we don’t feel like it, and we end up thinking something is wrong with us. Why shouldn’t I want to go out getting drunk every single Friday or Saturday night? Why shouldn’t I want to go to the same bar with my same friends or go to a party hosted by a friend of a friend of a friend on the other side of town? Because sometimes we prefer to stay in and there is nothing wrong with that. The current generation of 20-somethings has this completely inaccurate idea of the social calendar. It isn’t always full. Additionally, it isn’t filled automatically. Sometimes we have to do the planning ourselves. If you’re the kind of person who thinks that social events just come from no where: it’s probably time for you to plan something. Sufferers of FOMO far and wide will thank you for your efforts, and all of a sudden you’ll have something to show for your desire to have a good time: something more than just Facebook updates.

Contrary to what people want you to think, we all suffer from FOMO. We all have nights in which we have nothing to do. Absolutely nobody is alone in that. It’s a good idea to cherish those days or nights of boredom because as we age, we get less and less of those. Think about it. I’m 20 right now. In ten years (ideally) I’ll be married with a kid or two. Does the 30 year-old version of myself with two crying twin boys and a husband have the luxury of Netflix and hot cocoa? No, she does not. So, I shouldn’t let FOMO take away from this golden opportunity to do nothing for just one night.