1. They don’t love you if they don’t text you back.
People are not obligated to explain to you the reasons why they don’t communicate. We all lead busy lives and appreciate that for the fact that they’re doing something productive.
2. They’ll change for the better if you love them harder.
Unfortunately, even if you stay for the longest period of time, people don’t change that quickly. You have to stop loving people into their potential.
3. On-off relationships are completely normal.
Stop romanticizing toxic relationships. The right person won’t keep breaking up with you with every conflict.
4. Everyone goes through toxic relationships in their life.
Not everyone goes through this kind of abuse and trauma in their lives.
5. If it doesn’t hurt, it isn’t love.
Again, another misconception that causes toxic relationships. Real love may hurt, but it isn’t supposed to be self-destructive. Ever.
6. It’s you and them against the world.
Unlike the media, relationships don’t work that way. I’m sorry to say, but love doesn’t fix the existing issues in your life.
7. You can fix, save, or change them – or vise versa.
It’s not anybody’s responsibility to mend the broken and to save the lost, or even to make anyone better. At the end of the day, we’re our own responsibility.
8. Love is an excuse to act out.
Love is patient and kind, and no matter what, it’s never an excuse to treat people badly. Even if you’re angry, you’re grieving- whatever it is- it’s not an excuse to act out.
9. You are more worthy of a romantic relationship.
Relationships are just labels, and it doesn’t define your worth. At the end of the day, what defines your worth is yourself.
10. There is just ‘the one.’
News flash- ‘the one’ is the person that you end up marrying. You can have multiple people that can be right for you, but your soulmate is the one you spend the rest of your life with.
11. You “just know” when it’s right.
You don’t feel it when it’s right. Love is scary and it’s all about taking risks, even those that you’re not sure are worth the fall.
12. Love is supposed to be easy.
Relationships consist of both darkness and light, and they fail because people refuse to accept the darkness that comes with it.
13. Love is supposed to be difficult.
Unlike the above, love isn’t supposed to be difficult, either. Relationships take work, but it isn’t supposed to drain you more than fulfill you.
14. If it’s meant to be, then it will happen.
Life isn’t a fairytale and ultimately, relationships last when you work for it- not because destiny says so.
15. Right person, wrong timing.
There’s no such thing as wrong timing. It’s just something people say to soften a blow when relationships don’t work out. When you want it to work, you make it the right timing.
16. Real love is filled with passion and desire, and nothing less.
I think, toxic relationships have this attribute and when it’s not present in our relationship, we think it isn’t love. However, love is calm, safe, and secure. It’s not always supposed to fill you up with overwhelming emotions.
17. Love is spending every second together.
This is not only unrealistic but unhealthy. You can love someone, and spend time apart from them. After all, distance makes the heart grow fonder.
18. Opposites attract.
To some extent this may be true, but not for compatibility. You need to have similar mindsets and morals with them otherwise, you end up clashing.
19. Long-term relationships get boring.
No, relationships develop a sense of stability and comfort, as the time goes by. Relationships don’t lose their spark, they just settle down in familiarity.
20. Love is based on a feeling, not a choice.
Falling in love starts with attraction, but you stay in love with them because you choose to, every day. Love is committing to them, even when you don’t feel like it. That’s why marriages and long-term relationships work in the first place.
21. Healthy relationships consist of conflict.
Disagreements are normal in a relationship, but it’s never supposed to be constant- otherwise known as toxic behavior. Instead, constructive criticism should be present.
22. Romantic love is the only love that matters.
Romance is portrayed to an extreme in the media, but it isn’t the only love that matters. It’s beautiful and unlike any other, but there are different kinds of love exists.
23. People lose interest as a relationship progresses.
There are various definitions of effort, but people don’t always stop trying. Sometimes, you just stop seeing effort as it is. You can have a change of love language as the time goes by.
24. If you love them, you have to tolerate their behavior.
Love does not conquer all, and it doesn’t mean you need to accept being treated less than you deserve. Stand up for yourself when respect is no longer being served, and walk away if needed.
25. Two broken people will mend each other.
This is a recipe for disaster because two broken people will break each other open further. If anything, the aftermath is far worse than how you were prior to the relationship.