To The Girls That Always Fall For Potential

If you can’t be proud of the person you’re dating as they are right as this moment, then why are you dating them for the hopes of changing them into someone better?

By

To The Girls That Always Fall For Potential
Wendy Liu

We’ve all been there. We meet a guy and we think they’re everything we could want in a significant other — except for one problem. You’re in love with potential. You keep thinking, “If only he does X and Y, then he’s going to be the perfect guy for me.”

You probably have it in your head that you can make him better, that love alone can fix or save his brokenness. But don’t you realize that in fixing him, it’s destroying every beautiful and pure part of you until you lose yourself altogether?

I know that it’s hard to realize this when you’re so lost in him, but he doesn’t deserve you at all. It’s not that he’s necessarily an awful person, but he’s awful for you. You have to stop doing this to yourself. You can’t keep falling in love with potential.

Relationships aren’t based on the potential for them to love you the way you deserve. After all, what if that day never comes? If you can’t be proud of the person you’re dating as they are right as this moment, then why are you dating them for the hopes of changing them into someone better? If they are exactly the way they are 10 years from now, would you still want to spend your life with them? No? Then you owe it to yourself to walk away from the guy that doesn’t deserve you.

They keep giving you excuses, that they’re not ready for a relationship or that they need to fix themselves or that you have different priorities. When it all comes down to it, you have to realize that the right guy is going to want to commit to you no matter the odds and no matter how wrong the timing of it was.

The right guy is going to make the timing work because no one is ever ready for a relationship — we just make ourselves ready for the right person.

I know you’re such a hopeless romantic and you have so much love to give to the world, but you’re giving it all to the wrong people. You owe it to yourself to give yourself the love you keep giving to the wrong people. Love isn’t based on potential. You have to stop waiting for the day he’ll finally be the man who deserves an amazing girl like you because for all you know, you’re just dating the wrong guy for you.

Maybe it’s not about wrong timing. Maybe they’re just bad for you in every aspect.

You can’t teach respect and you can’t teach them how to treat you right; they should have to realize that on their own. The right guy would know you deserve the world.

Lastly, it was never your job to fix, change or save him. That should be his job. He should want to make himself better to deserve your love and nothing less. Thought Catalog Logo Mark