I know what it’s like to feel hurt and betrayed and I know how badly you want to pick up your phone and tell them they’re a piece of shit. You may feel like it will make you feel better, but it will have the opposite effect. Once the emotions subside, you will feel terrible for saying it, even if it’s true. If you take the high road, you can avoid this feeling of remorse altogether.

Relationships end for various reasons. It can be due to bad timing, different views on important life matters, or something as simple as someone falling out of love. Regardless of the reason, it’s going to hurt like hell. It’s going to feel like someone stabbed your heart with a searing hot knife and the pain may last for weeks, months, maybe longer. As soon as the breakup occurs, your stomach will fall into your chest and you will feel overcome with emotions. They will be spiraling out of control and the feeling of being rejected is in the forefront of your mind. When this happens, you must do your best to stay calm. I know – easier said than done.

Your first reaction may to be start crying, which is a natural reaction to getting your heart broken. But if someone broke up with you, do you think they’re actually going to care that you’re upset? Probably not. Your second reaction may to be scream and plead with them to reconsider. Do not, I repeat, do NOT do this. In your emotional state, you may believe that pleading with them will get them to change their mind. It won’t. And even if it does, you are simply prolonging the inevitable.

Here is what you need to do. When a man is going to break up with you, he goes into it expecting you to be a basket case. He is anticipating a waterfall of tears and endless pleas for him to stay. None of these reactions are going to do you any good in the long run. When he utters those fateful words, stand up tall and say “okay.” Nod your head and say your goodbyes with a smile on your face. Not only will this completely baffle him, but he will think highly of you when all is said and done. He may even doubt his decision to break up with you.

If you truly believe that the person who broke up with you is your soulmate, then it is even more imperative that you stay calm during this difficult time. The time apart will give your mind clarity and it will also help calm your emotions.  You need this time apart, so take it. Get to know yourself better and learn more about what you truly want out of life.

If you are meant to be soulmates, you will end up together again. Fate won’t let you lose him. It may be weeks, months, or years, but fate will bring him back. Even if you’re not meant to be together, you will feel better about yourself for not losing your cool. Your dignity will stay intact and you will be able to walk away a better, stronger person.