20 Things Only The Oldest Siblings Will Understand

Funny Or Die
Funny Or Die

1. You’ll never be the favorite. You have a better chance of both winning the lottery and hooking up with Kate Upton. Just look at James Franco. If he can’t even be the favorite then none of us have a chance.

2. Everything will be your fault. Your brother got in a fight at school while you were at home sick? If you would’ve toughed it out then this wouldn’t have happened.

3. The strongest feeling you’ll have toward your first born sibling for the first few years of their life is jealousy. That feeling will officially wear off when another kid is born because then your existing sibling will be the jealous one.

4. It will be a dark day the first time you lose any type of game to them. It could be Sorry, Go Fish or one on one in basketball it will all hurt the same.

5. You’ll always have the fewest Christmas presents. Sometimes it will be because you got a few bigger presents, but despite that it still sucks sitting there watching your siblings open presents well after you’ve finished.

6. No matter what age you are you will be expected to be both a tutor and teacher. You’d think that role would fall to your parents, but they’ll keep making reference to the fact that they haven’t been in school for over 20 years.

7. When you come home to visit you won’t recognize who your parents have become. The changes in their parent philosophy could be a list all to their own. You had a bedtime of 10 pm on school nights. Your brother watches Netflix to who knows what time. Your weekend was full of chores ranging from pulling weeds to cleaning your bathroom. Meanwhile your sister isn’t quite sure what a chore is.

8. Your impressive accomplishments will quickly be forgotten when your parents are raving about your sibling’s latest achievement. Somehow your brother’s 2.8 GPA seems to be much more impressive than when you were valedictorian.

9. You’ll constantly be torn between being the cool older sibling and the responsible one. Being the cool one is awesome and fun until you realize your sibling is going down a troubling path. Do you ignore it and just keep being best pals or do you step up to call them out knowing the strain you could put on the relationship?

10. The family vacations will only get better once you’re too old to justify tagging along. At the time you thought taking a weekend trip to Hershey Park was pretty cool. Now though as you see the Facebook photos of the family’s recent trip to Europe that you weren’t included in, you’re rethinking how much you liked Hershey.

11. If your younger siblings are much closer in age to each other than you then you’ll feel like an outsider at times. You’re all siblings and you love each other, but siblings close in age are often going to have a stronger relationship.

12. You can’t allow them to reach life milestones before you. Just imagine having to sit at your younger brother’s wedding answering every relative’s question about when your going to find that special lady. That sounds miserable.

13. Your role in your family is guinea pig. While raising you your parents tried all sort of different parenting techniques, most of them involve being tough on you. Now after trying all the bad ones out on you they can save the good stuff for your siblings.

14. It’s your responsibility to be a role model for all your siblings, but yet for some reason none of your siblings are expected to be the same for any of the ones younger than them.

15. You’ll fight with your siblings constantly no matter the age difference. It sounds bad but you don’t care that as a 14-year old you’re getting into an argument with someone in first grade. They need to know that you’re right.

16. The fact that Santa wasn’t real was broken to you earlier than most. The saddest part is the reason for you finding out was just so you could help your parents set up Christmas for your siblings’ enjoyment.

17. Every big event in your siblings’ lives will turn into an opportunity for you to reflect about your own mortality.

18. Your excitement when your brother starts dating will turn to fear and anger when it’s your sister’s turn to date.

19. You’ll get Facebook friend requests from almost every one of your sibling’s friends even though you don’t remember ever meeting most of them.

20. Despite all the added pressure and responsibility being a big brother or big sister will be one of the most proud titles you can ever have. Thought Catalog Logo Mark

About the author

Derek Lawrence

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