You Should Fall In Love With God, Not Me

Nicole Mason

Whatever you do, I beg of you, please don’t fall in love with me.

Don’t fall in love with me. I’m imperfect, a disaster trying to fix and heal from the wounds of the past. I am far from the ideal girl with a beautiful smile painted on rose lips.

Don’t fall in love with me. I’m a messy girl who can’t live without a little chaos. Some say I’m too much of a free thinker that challenges limits too often. I will push your buttons with the mess I frequently leave behind.

Don’t fall in love with me. I’m too independent, and tend to do things my way. I have a lot of ambitions and goals; some would say I dream too big and too much. I would rarely ask for you to hold my hand as I conquer my fears and reach for my dreams, and check off my bucket list. You might think that I don’t trust you, but it’s completely on me and my need for independence.

Don’t fall in love with me. I’mlazy and sometimes disorganized. I procrastinate when I know I have time. I’m a long way from fixing it, and I don’t want someone to fix it for me.

Don’t fall in love with me. I won’t shower you with compliments, instead deflate your ego. I’m too blunt for my own good sometimes. And, I am aware of it. I will say if you’re doing great and tell you your good qualities, but I won’t sugarcoat your BS.

Don’t fall in love with me. I love weird things. I gush about stationary, not clothes. I prefer reading books or stargazing, than going out for fancy dates. I’m a nerd and will probably embarrass you at how proud I am to be one. I like vintage things too much, and it would probably bore you.

Don’t fall in love with me. I am complex. I don’t usually let my emotions be known. I’ve learned how to sort them out and ignore them. I might come off as apathetic. I like extremes. I am completely adventurous, but I am also very feminine. I do martial arts and bake at the side. It would probably confuse you at how far away these activities are in the spectrum.

Don’t fall in love with me. I’m not a perfect lady. I curse, and act spoiled sometimes. I am unapologetic about who I am. I am raw and unfiltered. I cry too easily and laugh too heartily.

Don’t fall in love with me. I might break your heart. I might have tricked you into thinking at how ideal and carefree I am. I might let your expectations down, the more you get to know me.

Don’t fall in love with me. I easily feel inadequate and blame myself. You might think of me overreacting and assuming things, because I have a constant anxiety that I have done something to offend you when you act out of character.

Don’t fall in love with me. Because I have a hard time reciprocating feelings, and understanding them. You might end up hoping for nothing. And I don’t want that.

Don’t fall in love with me. I have given the key to my heart to God, and He’s going to be the one to show me who I should fall in love with. I’m not going to compromise my faith for a fleeting emotion that I am unsure of. I don’t want you to get hurt and disappointed.

Don’t fall in love with me. I won’t be able to reciprocate your feelings completely and wholly. I am still learning on how to do such a thing. And I do not want to do it for someone else, but Him.

Don’t fall in love with me. I have learned my lesson and I am wary about anything related to romance. I will definitely test your patience and make you wait.

Don’t fall in love with me. I am far from perfect.

Don’t fall in love with me. Rather, fall in love with Him. Because unlike me, He can love you fully and unconditionally without any second thoughts. Thought Catalog Logo Mark

More From Thought Catalog