10 Bullsh*t Excuse Emails Everyone Sends The Week Before Finals

Finals week means that you’ll be working hard on a number of things. You’ll be studying, writing, completing projects, drinking to numb the pain, and—perhaps most importantly— writing completely obvious bullshit excuse emails. Here are a few tributes to some of the greats.

1. The broken file

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2. The unspecified extenuating circumstances

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3. The subtle “so what’s my grade and exactly how much can I coast on this final?

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4. The unexplained power outage

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5. The TMI ‘food poisoning’

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6. The ‘throw ‘em under the bus’ like it’s nothing

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7. The new religion

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8. The petty crime that left you with nothing

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9. The death in the family

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10. The not-an-excuse 2AM panic attack mental break extravaganza!

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