My boyfriend and I are no strangers to the topic of marriage. After almost two years together, an apartment and a cat, we know that the next step in our relationship will be him putting a ring on it. The wedding plans will commence, and in addition to sending out cute “Will You Be My Bridesmaid” care packages, engagement photo shoots and losing thirty pounds before I go dress shopping, it will also signify me officially becoming part of my boyfriend’s family.

Here are 8 secrets I want to tell my future mother in law that she probably doesn’t know.

1.

I know that I will never be good enough for your son, because nobody ever will; I don’t take that personally. But, I promise that I will strive to be everything that you want for him: respectful, kind, loyal, and someone who will fiercely love him with every ounce of who I am.

2.

I will come to you when I have questions about motherhood, because just like my own mom, you’re also an expert. I will ask you questions. I will vent to you over frustrations. I will turn to you as a source of support and guidance. I want you to be an active part of our child’s life.

3.

I was terrified the first time I met you. I was sitting in the car in your driveway, breathing in deeply, hyperventilating because I was overwhelmed with nerves. I want you to know how badly I wanted you to like me, but more so, I want you to know how badly I wanted you to approve of me.

4.

I admire how much you love your son. I can see how much you care for him. It’s in the way you look at him, speak about him, and help him in any way you can. I want you to know that I think he’s very lucky to have you.

5.

I will never become one of those women who keep you and your son apart. I will never stand in your way, speak ill of you or show you any form of disrespect.

6.

I considered you my family the first time I talked to you about my difficulty having a child. We had just found out, and despite how far away we were from making those plans a reality, I had to speak with you because you have no idea how devastated your son was over it. He wanted to tell you, but couldn’t find the words. I was fatigued from talking about it – with my mom, my doctors, my best friend – but I know that he needed to hear from you as well that everything was going to be okay. Thank you for being that support for the both us during that difficult time.

7.

Your son is what gets me through every single day. Whether it’s’ venting about a long day at the office; standing by my side through thick and thin; sharing moments with me of love, kindness, and confusion – he is what inspires me to always give my best, to always try harder, and want to be a better person.

8.

I could never love someone the way I love your son. I fell in love with him the first time we had coffee together; the first time his lips brushed mine; the first time of everything. I continue to fall in love with him every moment, of every day, for the rest of my life. I vow to love him for eternity.