1. Don’t feel bad for distancing yourself from old friends who aren’t willing to grow up. It’s not your fault. Unless you wrote “Don’t ever change” in their high school yearbook and they really value your advice, in which case you’re moderately responsible, jerk.
2. Your childhood/teenage years that are being glorified may’ve been bill free and had significantly less responsibilities, but there were rules. Now, you can do WHATEVER YOU WANT*. Eat what you want, come and go as you want, pursue what you want. Yes, back in the day may’ve been great, but after all those restrictions, don’t forget to stop and smell freedom’s roses.
*Y’know, as long as it’s legal.
3. To follow up the previous point, this quote from The Office’s Andy Bernard is agonizingly true and should be remembered as often as possible: “I wish there was a way to know you’re in the good old days before you’ve actually left them.”
4. As annoying as a group text can be at times, it’s one of the easiest ways for ALL of your friends to stay in touch these days.
5. Pretty much nobody has any clue what they’re doing, what’s going on, or what all of this means – some people are just better at faking it than others.
6. You’re too young to be giving up on dreams you wholeheartedly want to pursue, and too old to be making excuses for why you aren’t chasing ’em.
7. Self-improvement is great but you don’t need to be prettier, skinnier, funnier or anything-er as much as you need to believe in and be comfortable with yourself.
8. Fitted sheets aren’t ever going to make sense; it’s not your fault.
9. If you’re still waiting for adulthood to begin, I’m sorry to inform you that it already started. We all expected a much louder, more profound commencement of some sort, but growing up just kind of happened, so instead of waiting for a big moment, you’ve got to hop aboard the moving locomotive and make things happen.
10. Most folks aren’t actually doing as amazing as their Instagram or Facebook albums named after beautiful countries might lead you to believe. Try not to get down on yourself for your life’s current lack of awesomeness when browsing social media.
11. The endless sea of engagements and marriages you’re surrounded by can make you feel behind and pressured to be involved in a serious romance, but don’t force it. If anything shouldn’t have a deadline on it, it’s finding your mate.
12. Your life is a TV show that has run for 20-something seasons. Some people will make wonderful, memorable guest appearances, but not everyone is going to be a part of the starring cast for the long haul.
13. Your metabolism may’ve slowed down, but you’ve got to take some of the blame if you don’t do it any favors. You might not ever have ripped abs but a little exercise will at least make you feel like you’re not going to walk up a flight of stairs and die or whatever.
14. Being unable to do things for yourself, like cook an actual meal, become less adorable and more shameful every year.
15. For the most part, nobody notices and/or cares about the tiny personal details you’re so uncomfortable about.
16. You may truly want to get a dog, but for those who are on the fence, keep in mind that it won’t remain a cute, tiny puppy but will still require you to take care of it.
17. Just go to the dentist. It’s so much better to go when you don’t want to than when you absolutely have to.
18. Your hangovers probably last 1-2 days now. Tread lightly.
19. Don’t linger with resentment towards past stuff, but appreciate the lessons learned from those mistakes, because being 25+ & naïve would’ve made a terrible combination.
20. If you can scroll through the same Instagram photos for the 4th time in 15 minutes, surely you can text or call your parents.
21. Michael Bay is going to acquire the rights to some of your favorite old cartoons and TV shows, it’s just inevitable. Minimize expectations, emotionally prepare yourself, and if you get too much Michael Bay movie in your eyes, wash it out with YouTube clips of the series’ original version.
22. You don’t have to feel bad for your friends who have kids, whether they planned it or not, because get this – many of them wanted to. Even the unplanned parents are fully capable, no need to weep for ‘em.
23. Sink or swim, EVERYTHING IS ON YOU. THERE’S NOBODY ELSE TO BLAME, IT’S 100% UP TO YOU TO FAIL OR SUCCEED. YOU MUST ADAPT AND OVERCOME OR BE EATEN ALIVE but no pressure, don’t freak yourself out.