Hi Everyone!

This week the girls feign anger as they question the morals and ‘husband material’ of a man they watched have sex with two other women on TV before uprooting their lives to date him on TV. It’s revealed that Nick also had sex with Liz before the show aired, and also that he enjoys Corinne’s advances — both things should be zero surprise to anyone who has paid attention to Nick’s personality for five seconds. It’s like going on Ben’s season and being surprised that he’s boring. But we have to spend an episode “questioning Nick’s intentions” anyway. (To further question them, see: “Here’s What Happened When Nick Viall Took Me To His ‘Fantasy Suite’”).

Here’s how the girls did this week, ranked by how likely they are to make it to the end:

our fallen soldiers

Dominique

Dominique was SO frustrating to watch this episode!!! The gross thing about the Bachelor is that it makes really beautiful women question their worth — which no one (besides like, actually bad people) deserves. But she self-sabotaged, a lot. If someone doesn’t seem that into you, there’s nothing you can do about it (besides binge read Thought Catalog articles to feel better). The last thing that’s going to be helpful is talking about it and drawing Nick’s attention to the fact that he clearly prefers other women to Dominique.

Hailey

Hailey goes home and I’m glad for it because listening to her complain about Nick being slutty after she introduced herself to him by telling him she wasn’t wearing underwear was really obnoxious.

Elizabeth

I really thought Elizabeth was getting an under the radar edit because she was going to go deep and they didn’t want to feature her too early. But Nick cleaned house on blondes this week and she was sent home with two other fair-haired girls.

Lacey

Lacey gave really funny interviews. She got eliminated pretty early but it would be fun to see her come back for Paradise.

Still in the running for Nick’s <3

Kristina

Kristina has no lines, no interviews, and no chemistry with Nick.

Corinne

Corinne is a crazy person in the best way. She’s incredibly entertaining to watch, and you almost root for her — before she forces you to remember that she’s also kind of mean and does histrionic things like calling her assistant a ‘nanny’. Every date Corinne goes on is a chance for her to show how needy she is. She has everything going for her (she’s beautiful, she’s smart, she has a great job, family and life) but she still can’t enjoy it or feel confident about it without constant validation.

Raven

Raven committed the cardinal Bachelor sin and spent all her alone time with Nick talking about another girl. I don’t care how dumb Corinne seems, you can’t waste your precious minutes with Nick complaining or doing anything other than building your relationship with him.

Jamie

Jamie has been in the background all season. I’m not sure if she’s going to come out of her shell or if they aren’t bothering to develop her because she’s going home next week.

Josephine

I keep forgetting that Josephine is just as kooky and weird as Alexis since they just show her a lot less. Nick sent 3 blondes home this week, so there may be a reason we’re not seeing a lot of her.

Jasmine

I love Jasmine because she comes from another one of my favorite shows Dallas Cowboys Cheerleaders: Making the Team but we’ve all seen the previews where she turns out to be this season’s second villain after Corinne — and I don’t think Nick has any interest in choosing a villain kind of girl in the end.

Taylor

The scene where the Backstreet Boys date is announced and all the girls freak out is SOO cute. They get a lot of loser musicians on this show but this choice was the perfect mix of fun nostalgia and probably not that expensive. Taylor was fun to watch and she had some good one-on-one time with Nick afterwards.

Later, she spends time in a hot tub with Nick and all she can do in it is talk about Corinne. GIRL.

Brittany

Brittany is under the radar at this point. She’s super psyched to go on an athletic date, but she’s not a prominent fixture on it. At the pool party, she and Nick get a little private time in the hot tub, but they don’t show us any interviews to talk about it.

Astrid

Astrid gets some weird hot tub time with Nick where she has to wear her work out pants — which totally destroys the whole purpose of being in a hot tub with someone. I also had to point out this insane floor length stripped jumpsuit she puts on for the evening part of the date ^^^^.

Vanessa

Nick Viall's Instagram — Nick Viall’s Instagram

It’s Vanessa’s big moment, she gets to go on a fun one-on-one date with Nick. They bond over having fun and over Vanessa getting sick near the end and it’s been clear from the beginning that Nick is really into her. However, I don’t get it? And I think the real Vanessa comes out later when she immediately starts making weird demands on Nick and telling him that she’s judging his actions. The same kind of actions she’s seen Nick demonstrate on all the other Bachelor shows he’s been on. It kind of shows she’s not even really looking for him she’s looking for any guy who is ‘husband material’.

Whitney

I had to go back and watch this entire episode before I remembered that Whitney exists. I’m not sure if it’s because she’s a little bit of a wallflower or because she’s not going to make it far.

Christen

I like Christen so I’m placing her up here even though I have no real reason to. I don’t think Nick is into her. But he should be.

Alexis

Alexis really grew on me this episode. She’s so fun and happy and bubbly. I want her to be on all the dates.

Sarah

Sarah is a tiny little girl who is excited about everything and claps her hands together a lot — which in Bachelor land means she has huge potential.

Danielle M

Danielle M didn’t get a date this week, but they had an awesome one-on-one last week, so that’s to be expected. We’ll see a lot more of her next episode. Also, my mom keeps telling me that Danielle isn’t there for the right reasons because back in Nashville she was in a Dierks Bentley music video.

Danielle L

Danielle and Nick get a private serenade by the Backstreet Boys which is supposed to be a prize but is in fact SO AWKWARD. I wanted to cover my eyes when it was on the screen. Regardless, she’s beautiful and bubbly and definitely seems to be one of Nick’s favs.

Rachel

Rachel is one of the most flawless human beings we’ve had on the Bachelor. She’s too good for Nick and she’s too good for this show. It’s kind of early to start choosing favorites for the next Bachelorette but she’s my favorite for the next Bachelorette.