She has high expectations for you, because she has them for herself. She wouldn’t ask something of you that she wasn’t ready to do, and though she knows that a good relationship means being able to support each other, she knows that doesn’t just go one way. There may be times when she needs your help, but it’s more important to her that you know that you could ask for the same, anytime. She wants to be the shoulder you can cry on, half of the team, and bring her own independence to be able to create something stronger between you. She doesn’t expect everything to be handed to her, because she knows everything will be better if it’s built by two.
She does love to be taken out, wined and dined, brought to a favorite movie. But she wants to do the same for you. She wants to say “No, I’ve got this” when you’re reaching for your wallet, and to not let you look at the bill. She wants to surprise you by cooking dinner at home, sure, but she also wants to surprise you by taking you out to an amazing one. She doesn’t believe in the outdated gender norms of “the man always pays,” or “the woman always takes care of the home,” because she knows that there is joy in doing both. She’s not afraid of being in the kitchen because she knows that we don’t have to reject every stereotype, but she’s not afraid to break them, either.
It makes her happy to treat you because that’s what life’s about, and only children get taken care of 100 percent of the time. She knows it’s about give and take.
And when it comes to communication, she knows it’s key, but she also doesn’t expect anyone to be “on” 100 percent of the time. If you’re having a night out with the guys, she doesn’t expect that you’ll text her every minute, and she doesn’t get jealous because she sees your female coworker writing on your Facebook wall. She has enough confidence in herself, and in the relationship, to know that what you have doesn’t need to be reassured and confirmed every minute of every day. It’s okay to take a breather every now and again, because then you’ll have something to talk about when you see each other next.
Besides, she knows that some of the best communication is spontaneous. Picking up your phone in the morning to a lovely text, or a dirty picture, or something totally unexpected is part of what makes life romantic. Not feeling like your communication has to be on a schedule is part of that, and she doesn’t expect anyone to check in with her on a mandated basis. She’s doing fine, and you don’t have to worry about her.
Because when she needs you, she’ll ask. She’s not afraid of looking weak, because she knows that everyone needs help sometimes, and nothing about that makes you a weak or fragile person. The whole point of being in love is to be on a team, and to not have to go through everything alone. And when she’s feeling low, she trusts that you’ll be there to support her, or just to listen, because she would do the same for you. Your support is what makes her strong, what allows her to pursue her independence, and what gives that confidence. She’s not afraid of seeming “needy,” because she knows that when you love someone, you need them. In the best way possible.
A real woman brings this knowledge to her relationships because she doesn’t want one built on what he can buy, or how often he texts her to check in. She wants one built on equality and love, like only two real adults can actually have.