10 Pieces Of Advice I Wish I Had Sooner In Life
Ten affirmations Charlotte Freeman, best-selling author of You Were Always Growing (Even In The Dark), wishes she had sooner in life.
1. Slow down.
You do not need to tick everything off your to-do list in the first quarter of your life. You do not need to have it all worked out. You do not need to know all of the answers just yet—you are not even supposed to know all of the answers just yet.
2. You deserve more than one-sided relationships.
You are worthy of healthy love and healthy relationships. You deserve people who choose you back.
3. It’s okay to change your mind.
It’s okay to change your mind about your career, a person, your purpose, or the general direction of your life. You deserve to live the version of your life that excites you the most, and sometimes that means taking a step backwards or letting people down. Have the courage to do it anyway. Sometimes you need to go backwards to go forwards.
4. Don’t stress yourself out with your need to people-please.
The truth is, it’s impossible to please everyone and you will let yourself down trying to keep everyone else happy.
5. A romantic partner should not cost you your mental health.
Your partner should make you feel calm and safe, not anxious and unsure. Your partner should support your growth, not make you feel small and insignificant.
6. Your first breakup will absolutely break you.
But you will come back stronger than ever. You will feel on top of the world once you realize you have healed from your heartbreak and you will know that you can get through this again if you need to.
7. If someone doesn’t love you, it doesn’t mean you are any less deserving of love.
If someone doesn’t want to be with you, it doesn’t mean that you’re not pretty enough, skinny enough, or desirable enough—it means they are not your person.
8. There are some situations that are beyond your control.
You will cause yourself so much stress and anxiety trying to control them anyway. Sometimes you need to let go and let things be as they are, and know that you can deal with whatever comes your way.
9. Closure is not necessary to move forward.
It’s okay to move forward without the answers. It’s okay to leave the past in the past without dissecting exactly why things ended up the way they did. Sometimes the best thing you can do to protect yourself is to just keep going, to move forward, without all of the tiny details. You have the rest of your life to live—don’t get stuck in the moments that won’t matter years from now.
10. Avoiding the things that make you anxious won’t make them disappear.
In fact, it does the complete opposite.
