Learn To Be Happy Without Them, And Then Let Them Go

Know that while this person may not be replaced, the void from their absence can be filled in the future if you allow it to.

By

adam.barabas
adam.barabas
adam.barabas

There are many people that come and go in our lives. The faces of people in my past sometimes run through my head like a slideshow or pages of a picture book being flipped through quickly. I have suffered heart break with them and shared many laughs, but they no longer need to physically be in my life. I recall events with them so clearly that I could write a memoir and list their names on the dedication page. I am beyond thankful for the lessons and memories, whether they are happy or sad.

I believe that every person that walks into your life is a chapter in your story. They may be a guest character that comes and goes, or they could be a main character that sticks around until the conclusion. Either way, every character serves a purpose. It’s crucial to your well-being to know this and to be able to accept when someone is no longer necessary in the plot.

Know that while this person may not be replaced, the void from their absence can be filled in the future if you allow it to.

As you grow older it will come as second nature to know when someone is finished with their part. Your natural instincts will kick in and you will know it’s time to let them go. It may not be a sign blasted directly in your face, but you will sense it in the back of your mind. Having a major fall out with a person isn’t always the way the relationship comes to an end.

It may be when you have a dead end conversation with a friend and you feel like it is being forced. They may appear uninterested in good things happening in your life and you feel like it is sucking your positive energy out by being around them. Or you may simply feel like spending time with them is an obligation. Have you ever left a person and felt mentally drained? They may not have even done anything wrong. Their role in your life is just not fitting in with the storyline any longer.

Relationships should always feel genuine, even if they are not necessarily easy.

Sometimes it is surprising; a person you think won’t play a major role in your life, ends up sticking it out, and every time you see each other you can carry on a conversation as if no time has passed. You should be able to pick up where you left off every time you see each other, and not feel like you are always rebuilding your connection. Time and distance should never prevail over your bond, if it does you will continue to grow apart, and the chapters of your life will continue to be written with or without them.

You have to always remind yourself that it is okay to let people go. It is also important to forgive them if they have acted out against you, and respect the purpose they had in your life. The time you have on this planet is limited and you must continue to make room for more memories and experiences with new people. Refrain from getting stuck in negativity so you are free to constantly change and move with where your life leads you.

Break the chains of obligation that keep you involved with someone that takes more than they give and learn to be happy without them.

It may be easier than you think. You get to decide how your story goes, which characters play a major role, and who you let mentally drag you down. Wouldn’t you rather your story be a positive one? Thought Catalog Logo Mark