The universal feeling when going through a breakup, to use internet speak, is FML. You’re typically going to walk around with “FML” tatted all over your face for a good week/month/ten years.
Breaking up can feel like eating shit while recklessly speeding in a golf cart.
Or it can feel like getting smacked in the face while doing some kind of hang-glide thing?
It’s tempting to get really angry at the other person. After all, they have just ripped a large ass carpet out from under you and now you might have to go on OkCupid dates with strangers.
You might want to try and get the upper hand by acting like you don’t care.
You might feel like going insane and strangling someone (or hunting them down and murdering them with an axe, everyone’s different).
You might feel like being a big weepy self-pity puddle for a while.
You might go into denial and not want to even accept that the breakup is official.
You might feel like celebrating if it’s been a messy, difficult breakup. At least in the moment, you might feel like you’re not going to miss him or her, or think of them fondly later.
Or you might feel like retroactively disowning all of your feelings and the whole relationship.
Or you might say you love him or her in hopes they’ll change their mind even though the breakup has clearly happened, like, for real.
But I think there are different levels of sincerity with saying “I love you” to someone who’s punted your heart out of the stadium. If you really love him or her, it likely will linger in you even if you can’t be together and even if it’s not reciprocal.
It seems good and mature, if you can summon up the will and strength, to wish the other person the best, whether you’re the break-upper or the broken-up-wither, because there was something in that person that you admired or liked or loved, and that will always be with them, and with you.
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