I Love You, But I Need You To Let Me Go

boram kim
boram kim

It’s obvious we’re not good for each other. We’re like fire and gasoline. When we mix we’re a deadly combination, but the hardest part about all of it is that I love you and I can’t let you go, not on my own at least.

I keep hanging on, I keep clinging to you and I keep hoping that maybe one of us will change so we mesh better together. I want us to work out with every ounce of want I have in my heart, but it just hasn’t happened and I don’t think it ever will.

It kills me to think of living without you, it’s like my throat swells so I can’t say the words out loud. My eyes get watery and I a sick feeling in my stomach when I think of not being with you any longer, but it’s something I have to do. I know it is. We have to end this, we have to stop living this lifestyle and let each other go.

I’m not strong enough to let you go on my own, I need you to let me go.

I need you to tell me we’re through, I need you to stop showing up in my life. I need you to stop calling and stop making me feel for you.

I don’t know when I’ll stop loving you, but I need to go my separate way.

So, please, let me go.

I don’t know where I’ll go after you, I don’t know what I want to do, but I know it will be good for me. It will be good for me to get you out of my head. It will be good for me to start living for myself again without the thoughts of you flooding my brain.

And maybe they will still be there, maybe they won’t ever really go away, maybe you’ll always be living in the back of my mind but I think I’m okay with that.

I think I’m okay with you having a lasting impact on my life because you were one of the best things that have ever happened to me and I don’t want to let that die completely.

I just need a step back, I need to regain my life and I need to stop loving someone who is so painfully toxic for me.

You’re my own personal form of cocaine and each time I take a hit I crave another. It’s time I let the addiction die out for good.

I need to cut you out, I need to set myself free, but I need your help to stop. I need you to tell me enough is enough, I need you to let me go for good. I don’t want anymore texts coming through my phone, I don’t want anymore ‘likes’ popping up in my notifications from you. It all has to come to an end.

You were one of the best and worst things for me and as much as I love you it’s time for me to walk away. It’s time for me to move on to better things and that means leaving you behind. It means putting myself first and feeling good about myself, on my own. It means I need to stop relying on you for my happiness and start discovering my own.

We’re like a bad train wreck you can’t look away from, but eventually someone has to come and clean it up. That person has to be me, I can’t stay burning in the crash any longer. I need to get up and move on with my life.

As painfully as this is and this will be, I need you to let me go once and for all. I need to stop holding on to you. I need this to be the end. Thought Catalog Logo Mark

About the author

Becca Martin

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