Here Is My Advice To You In This Beautiful Mess We Call Life


Think of others, but always put yourself first. No, I don’t mean be selfish, don’t cheat your waitress out on tips, don’t be stingy when it comes to friends and don’t only take from people without ever giving.

Instead make sure you don’t burn yourself out always catering to other’s needs, while their physical and mental health are important – your health is equally important.

If you don’t have a lot of money then save it for yourself, don’t spend it, but volunteer your time, ask a friend who seems off if they are okay, help your elderly neighbor carry a bag or mow their lawn. Most people won’t ask for much, they’ll just be gracious for your time.

Live out your goals and dreams, make a list and physically write them down and don’t stop until you achieve them all, no matter how out of reach they may seem. The only time they truly become out of reach is when you stop trying, so don’t give up.

Don’t settle; if you take one thing away from this it’s to please never, ever settle. Don’t settle in life, in love, in a career, in a relationship, with friends or any other aspect of your life. Just don’t settle.

Don’t work a corporate start up job because you need money, or work it because realistically you can’t pay the bills unless you do, but don’t stop looking for what you really want. Don’t be afraid to quit because it’s making you unhappy. If you hate getting out of bed every morning and you’re only in your 20s you’ve still got too much time to go to do something you hate every day.

And the same goes when you’re in your 50s or 60s, it’s never too late to up and walk away from a job you hate. You can always start fresh, open a bakery or a diner, start selling your artwork or find a passion and turn it into a moneymaking opportunity. It’s never to late to start over, never.

Don’t settle in love, being in a hallow relationship that doesn’t fill you with happiness and joy isn’t worth it. It’s not worth the stress and the guilt you’re putting yourself through. You should be with someone who makes you happy, someone who lifts you up and pushes you to do best. Someone who inspires you to achieve things outside your comfort zone and someone who truly makes you a better person.

Don’t surround yourself with friends who don’t make you happy, who gossip about other people’s misfortunes because that’s not a healthy relationship. Don’t place yourself in friendships who look down upon others instead of reaching out a hand to help them out.

Fill your heart with love and if something doesn’t feel right – leave.

You will experience heartbreak, but you will be okay. I promise. Even if it doesn’t feel like it right now, you will be okay because it isn’t the end of the world. You will find other reasons to smile and laugh. You will feel happy again surrounded by family and friends. You will learn that just because your heart was broken doesn’t mean you’re lacking love.

There will be tough times, I won’t deny that, but it doesn’t mean there won’t be times when your heart is so full you can’t help but share it with the world. There will be times you just want to hug everyone around you because you survived and you found happiness on your own and that’s an amazing feeling.

Don’t live in the past, it’s not worth it because you can’t go back. Sometimes that’s difficult to accept, but take photos and cherish the memories that live inside your head. Write the moments down the way they happened at the time, and when you’re feeling sad don’t be afraid to smile as you look back, but just keep moving forward because there are still great times ahead.

Love with all your heart, put your passion into the things you do and take pride in your work and accomplishments. You should feel proud of yourself when you achieve a goal and don’t let anyone tell you otherwise. It’s perfectly okay to congratulate yourself as long as you aren’t rubbing your success in the face of your peers.

It’s okay to be wrong and to fail; if you aren’t failing at anything then you’re not growing. Failure can be the best teacher so embrace the failure and let it change you because change doesn’t have to be a bad thing, so do not fear it.

Lastly, save the world. You don’t have to find the cure for world hunger or cancer, you don’t have to supply everyone with drinking water, but make a difference. Care about the environment; use recyclable water bottles and reusable shopping bags. Don’t liter, donate your energy into cleaning up garbage, even if it’s two hours once a year. Donate old clothes and turn off your heat during the day. Go on a mission trip, give a friend a hand without expecting anything or walk your friends dog. You can always do something; the little changes can make a big difference.

Believe in miracles, spread love, surround yourself with good vibes and never, ever settle. Good things take time, so be patient. And if everything feels like it’s going wrong – breathe, it will work out. All you have to do is trust. Thought Catalog Logo Mark

About the author

Becca Martin

Insta with me

More From Thought Catalog