This Is What Love Is (And Isn’t)


Love is selfless; it’s putting your partner before yourself because you know their happiness is your happiness. Love is giving and it’s kind, it’s there when you need a shoulder to lean on and when your laughing so hard you have tears streaming down your face.

It’s respectful, it’s knowing when enough is enough and when to tone it down. It’s buying medicine for your partner when they are sick, it’s cooking them breakfast in bed on days they don’t feel like getting up, it’s putting their best interest first.

Love is selfless, love is kind and love is hopeful.

Love is not selfish, love is not putting your partner down, and love is not being concerned with only yourself. Love is not doing what makes you happy with no regards to your partner.

Love is not double standards; love is not being controlling and manipulative. Love is not hurting your partner in order to feel better about yourself.

Love is not disrespecting your partner’s boundaries and wishes.

You can’t claim you love someone if you are disrespecting them and putting yourself first constantly.

If you truly love someone – not just their company, not just their money, not just their body – you won’t hurt them. You won’t put yourself before them and you won’t let them feel pain, especially pain inflicted by you.

Love is selfless and doing things you might not want to do, but still doing them because you know it will make your partner happy. Love is appreciating all the things your partner does for you.

Love is making sacrifices for your partner’s gain, but it is your partner sacrificing for you, too. Love is not a one-way street, love is pulling your own weight and pulling it as equally as possible.

Love is embracing a person, in all the good and bad ways. It’s loving them regardless of an injury they get or a sickness they begin to suffer from. It’s loving them through it all and never leaving them to face it by themselves, no matter how difficult it might be. Love is fighting for them, even if they try to push you away because they don’t want you to see them when they’re down.

Love is accepting your partner as who they are and not trying to change them to fit into a cookie cutter shape of the person you want them to be because love is accepting.

Love is patient and understanding and fun. More than anything love is fun and it is growing with another person.

Love is selfless, love does not make you look like a fool and it does not hurt you.

Love is complimenting each other in a good way. It is showing each other off, taking pride in each other’s achievements and embracing each other whole heartedly. It is laughing together when one of you does something embarrassing, it is drying tears off each other’s faces when something tragic happens and it is letting the good and bad moments we all face in life bring you closer together.

That is selflessness and that is love. Thought Catalog Logo Mark

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