I’m so sorry you spent so much time battling back and forth in your own head because he couldn’t treat you the way you deserved.
He should have given you roses, but instead he only picked you weeds.
You loved him, you constantly tried to see the best in him and you really wanted things to work out between you, but you couldn’t keep killing yourself over the expense of your dead end relationship.
I know leaving hurt you; it nearly broke you. You didn’t want to do it but you knew hanging on would only leave you empty inside and for that I’m sorry.
You gave it your all, I watched you pour your heart into the relationship. I wanted you cry because you didn’t know what to do. I watched you suffer because you always wanted more, but you didn’t want to sound too needy.
Watching you taught me that sometimes you can’t make a person love more or give more, sometimes they’re giving you all they’ve got, but that still might never be enough. It isn’t a bad thing, don’t ever let anyone tell you it’s a bad thing. You just want someone to be able to love you the way you love them, and someone will, it just won’t be him.
I watched you give and give and give, but all you were left with was emptiness inside your chest because you were always giving pieces of yourself to someone who could never give anything back.
You deserve more than that and I know you know that too, that’s why you broke it off.
You know you owe it to yourself to have someone in your life who lights you up on the inside. Someone who isn’t only willing to put in the same amount of effort as you, but wants to put in the effort because your relationship is important to him.
It might take weeks or months or years, but someone will come into your life and fit into your life like a glove. You will find happiness in him and he will find happiness in you.
I know right now you might not believe that, you might have thought he was the one, but he wasn’t.
I know it’s hard for you to believe that there really wasn’t a diamond until all that dust that you spent so much time polishing, but you can’t let it consume you.
Find yourself in this world, on your own two feet and move forward. Let him go, if he begs for you back, which he should because he’s only now realizing how good he had it, don’t go back. Don’t go back to the person who broke you because he can’t fix you. He can’t undo the damage he’s already done.
Use the time to find yourself and to grow because someone great will come along and you’ll be happy you stopped investing time into a stagnant relationship and started investing in yourself instead.