You Cannot Chase Someone Who Does Not Want To Be Caught

Don Graham
Don Graham

If a someone wants you he will make it known.

They will answer your texts, maybe not right away because they have a life (which is a good thing). But they won’t constantly and consistently leave you hanging. They will come over and hang out with you and your friends when you ask them to. They will be in your life. They will make an effort. No one, for the most part, is that complicated. There are the exceptions, there are always exceptions, but for the most part if someone is interested in you they will make an effort and if not, you need to quit wasting your time.

Trying harder to get the guy or the girl generally won’t make your relationship progress any further because more times than not it will be a major turn off. But it is the same for men and women.

If they want to be with you they will make it known. They will text you back, they will respond to you. Instead of letting you double text over and over, they’ll speak up. They will come over and hang out with you when you invite them, and they will make an effort to make you feel important.

As humans we always crave attention from those who don’t give us attention.

The saying who cares less has more power is accurately true because the one who cares less won’t get their heart broken and they won’t be made a fool of.

When your heart is involved you do stupid things, even like trying to convince yourself to continue pursing someone you have no business pursuing.

The signs are basically laid out for you. You can tell your best friend to stop texting that bitch or that asshole because you know they are wasting their time and you don’t want to see them get hurt. You know they are more emotionally invested into the “relationship” and you know it isn’t going to work out in their favor. You can see clearly because your heart isn’t on the line.

But it’s so much easier said than done when it comes to your heart.

It’s a hard to take your own advice in that case because you think maybe if you try hard enough you will be the exception, you will be the one who changes them and you can steal their heart. But realistically you won’t win them over, you’re just another person to keep them busy or foolishly annoy them.

Don’t stay when you know you should leave. Don’t beg for the emotional investment of someone who doesn’t want you and please, don’t beg for love. Don’t continue to text him when he hasn’t answered your last three messages. Don’t ask her to hangout when she has declined your last few invitations because if she wants to hangout she will ask you. Stop holding onto people who are already 20 steps ahead of you and not looking back.

Aside from the rare exception, no one is chasing you down after realizing they just let you slip their naïve little finger tips. Life isn’t a romantic movie; no one is running to the airport to get on the same plane as you, no one is showing up at your doorsteps with a poetic apology about how stupid they were to let you go.

Don’t place your self worth in the palms on someone who has no intentions of sticking around when you fall and more importantly, don’t chase after them. TC mark

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You look back and you just feel stupid.
You can’t forgive yourself for falling
or believing all the lies.
You reread every text.
You relive every memory.
And it all starts making sense —
he never wanted love.
He only wanted attention.
He only wanted validation.

“It’s just wondrous how every time I go through some emotional trauma, your posts are so relatable and it gives me so much hope. I love the writing and the photos. It’s all a pleasure to read. I can’t thank you enough for it, really.” — DM from @ThoughtCatalog Instagram follower

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  • http://foulkesgeorge.wordpress.com True George

    Its ironic when one wants to get rid of someone or want them to leave. The more you ignore them, don’t return calls, or do hurtful things to them. They work harder to stay with you….go figure

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