1. When you see the red “Facebook notification” or text message pop up you become annoyed when you can’t instantly check what it is. As if there is a slight chance Ryan Gosling may have just liked your new default pic and you MUST.KNOW.NOW.
2. You literally get anxiety knowing you won’t be able to check your phone for a span of time. You feel almost compelled to let everyone know for the next hour you won’t be able to see it so nothing important can happen to anyone, anywhere. “What do you mean I shouldn’t bring my phone into the funeral mass?”
3. You treat your phone like you would a small child. It is within arm’s reach and in clear eye sight at all times.”Is my phone right there? Do you see my phone over there?..Just checking.”
4. If God forbid it breaks you screech like someone just ran over a beloved pet and IMMEDIATELY drive in the direction of a phone store to get it fixed. Extra $100 to buy one that’s already at the store? No question, sold.
5. You mentally pat yourself on the back when you go even a small period of time without looking at it. “Wow that was a whole fifteen minutes! I’m doing pretty good.” It is the ” I could stop at any time” mentality.
6. You are that person texting at the movie theater, or my personal fav. to spot, while on the elliptical at the gym.
7. You have walked into things, people, parked and or moving cars while staring down at your phone.
8. If anyone has your phone in their hand you momentarily stop breathing and try to control yourself from snatching it from their grip (probably a combo of separation anxiety and sheer fear of who/what may be text to you at that given moment).
9. You have had entire conversations whilst on your phone with zero recollection of what was said.
10. You have actually debated (or dare I say it stopped) mid hookup to answer or check your phone because you just couldn’t help it.