Thought Catalog

10 Assumptions About Independent Women That Are Completely Wrong

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Jeff Isy
Jeff Isy

1. They don’t want relationships.

Want and Need are two very, very different words. None of us really need anyone, unless you are quite literally a baby and still dependent on an older human being to take care of you. But considering yourself an independent woman doesn’t cancel out a desire for companionship. Not to mention, the ultimate ~*~*independent lady~*~ Queen Bey has been married for 8 years. So like, chill. Being in love is fantastic. No one is disputing that.

2. Or if they’re single, they’re only pretending to enjoy it.

Some people genuinely like being on their own. There’s nothing wrong with that. This idea that all women are desperate to be with someone is a gross fallacy. For as many dudes out there who are living the bachelor life and badadadada — lovin’ it, same amount of women are out there also completely content.

3. They’re cold-hearted bitches.

Lmao, whaaaaat? I remember reading a comment (NEVER READ THE COMMENTS) on something a friend of mine wrote that went along the lines of, “Ugh, all these independent ladies who think that’s a better thing to be called than bitch.” How does someone’s level of independence have ANYTHING to do with how nice/bitchy they are? Personally, I’d love it if we could retire the word bitch and just go classic Nice or Mean. But hey, I’m a dreamer. One of the kindest people I know in the whole world loves traveling different countries totally solo. She just does her own thing and – OH YEAH – actually volunteers at soup kitchens. Huge bitch, am I riiiiight?

4. They’re constantly having sex.

Damn, if so, good for you, giiiirl. But also not necessarily true. Being independent A) doesn’t always mean you’re single and B) doesn’t mean you’re getting laid 24/7. Because no one really is. That just sounds like a recipe for chafing. Ouch.

5. Or, they’re never having sex.

Think Sandra Bullock’s character in The Proposal. Tightly wound and incredibly sexually repressed. Because you know, movie archetypes are definitely accurate to real life situations. Always.

6. They rely on money from their parents.

This is just insulting. Sadly, you wouldn’t assume the same about a man. But when a woman lives on her own and seems to be doing well? Mommy and Daddy MUST be paying. *eye roll*

7. They don’t care what you think.

Repeat after me: everyone cares (at least a little). We’re programmed to. That’s why sociopaths are abnormal — because they don’t give a shit about society. But while she may care, she isn’t going to let someone’s opinion cripple her.

8. They never doubt themselves.

Really? They are human. C’mon now.

9. They have Daddy Issues.

Honestly, this one doesn’t even make sense. A woman who is secure with who she is and doing her own thing is WAYYYY more likely to have grown up with an awesome, supportive father. From early on she was instilled with a healthy sense of self-worth, and having the first male figure in her life strongly reaffirm that only made her more confident in herself.

10. They’re only this way because of a terrible past heartbreak.

Again, could we get any more Hollywood cliche? Sure, most of us have had our lil’ hearts torn apart at some point. It happens. But a confident, badass woman doesn’t always have some break up related trauma at the root of it. Maybe she’s just always been a boss. TC mark

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