21 Reasons Life Would Be Super Chill If You Could Just Be A Cat

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1. You live by your own rules. And better believe EVERYONE in the household knows it.

2. You’re a respected rebel with little to zero consequences for your actions.

3. Feeling annoyed? Just knock everything off the nearest table with a flick of your paw. Someone else will clean it up.

4. Still feeling annoyed? Swat the first person who walks by.

5. You can lick your genitals and no one will bat an eye.

6. You can literally hide from people whenever you want.

7. When company comes over that you’re not fond of, you can just chill under the couch until they leave.

8. You’re almost expected to be antisocial.

9. People feel very special when you decide to grace them with your affection.

10. You don’t have to cook for yourself.

11. No seriously, someone just feeds you. You get to lazily sit by your dish and wait for those inferior humans to do your bidding.

12. If someone touches you in a way you don’t like, you can hiss or scratch the hell out of them.

13. And they definitely won’t touch you like that again.

14. Napping all day long is in your job description.

15. You can go full nocturnal and no one will accuse you of being the Unabomber.

16. That sandpaper tongue of yours can be used as a weapon, if necessary.

17. The Internet is obsessed with you.

18. You can do something stupid, clever, or just look kind of weird and instantly become an overnight celebrity.

19. Nobody shames you for your naturally growing hair.

20. You can leap super high distances, like you’re a low-key superhero.

21. You get pets and massages just because you exist. Good for you. TC mark

Ari Eastman

✨ real(ly not) chill. poet. writer. mental health activist. mama shark. ✨

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