10 Signs You’re In A Serious Relationship With Coffee

1. It’s the first thing you think of when you wake up

You’ve barely opened those peepers when your brain already starts brewing (hehehe, see what I did there?) and visuals of dancing, steaming mugs start taking over your every thought process. Must. Acquire. Coffee. Now.

2. It has the ability to turn your whole day around

You know those days when everything seems to go wrong? It’s a never-ending parade of shit, and you’re just like, “SERIOUSLY? CAN I GET A BREAK HERE?” And then, like pure magic, your knight in shining armor appears in a 16 oz cup. The clouds suddenly aren’t as dark. The birds are singing, and now you find it charming instead of annoying. Your caffeine bae has done it again.

3. You feel weird when someone says they prefer tea

It’s totally irrational and you probably wouldn’t ever admit to it out loud, but when someone says they like tea more, you feel a little insulted. You like tea more than coffee? MY coffee? So basically you’re saying you hate my significant other. I need time to process this.

4. Everyone knows how much you like coffee

Like all people in love have been guilty of from time to time, you just can’t stop yourself from gushing about the special someone in your life. You look for small ways to bring it up. Little comments here and there. Oh, yeah we should definitely have brunch at this new spot! I heard they have some of the best coffee in the whole city.

5. You know that distance makes the heart grow fonder

…but that doesn’t mean you’re willing to test it out. You’re so happy together, why would you ever take time apart? Don’t be ridiculous.

Gilmore Girls
Gilmore Girls

6. You feel like you’re cheating when you go to a different spot than usual

I have never cheated in a relationship, but I gotta tell you as a diehard Peet’s Coffee & Tea girl, nothing makes me feel dirtier than when I go to Starbucks. *whispers softly* “Grande, please.” When you are dedicated to a specific shop, brand, etc, it feels incredibly scandalous when you branch out.

7. You need it

GO AHEAD. Throw out the label codependent. I accept it with open arms. And for those seriously into our coffee relationships, we’re fine admitting it. We don’t just want this relationship. We need it. BUT WE COULD STOP ANYTIME WE WANT, SERIOUSLY.

8. You’re immediately comforted by the aroma

Have you ever been super into someone and the way they smell lingers on your clothes, and then later you smell it and can’t help from feeling all giddy and gooey inside? It’s the same with coffee, but so much better.

9. You think about it when you hear romantic songs

“Youuuu were always on my miiiind. Oh, yooouuu were always on my miiiiind.”

10. You can’t remember a time without it

You probably didn’t come out of the womb slurping down lattes, and to think there was ever a period in your life when coffee wasn’t an important part is the most bizarre thought. It’s dramatic, sure, but your whole life changed with that first cup of Joe. It was like Aladdin singing to you on a magic carpet ride. “I can show you the world.” Thought Catalog Logo Mark

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About the author

Ari Eastman

✨ real(ly not) chill. poet. writer. mental health activist. mama shark. ✨