There are plenty of articles of long distance love and the joy/pain that come and go with it…but what about being in like? What about the struggle of connecting with someone for just one weekend and then having to fly back across country? What happens when what was supposed to be a one-night stand takes you completely by surprise and suddenly you’re yearning for more?
I think that feeling is almost worse.
The daunting “what-if-we-lived-near-each-other” question continually circling through your mind, the unrealistic daydreams of one of you moving closer to one another, the constant replay of your short-lived lust affair. Let’s not forget when the modern dating complexities come into play – the uncertainty of whether or not to send a text, analyzing his ‘best friends’ on Snapchat and wondering if that girl he Instagrammed is romantically significant or not. The worst part is that all you had was one weekend together. Yes, it was amazing. Yes, when you two talk/text, it’s as if you’ve known each other for longer than you have. But when it comes down to it… what is the point?
I’m a realist. I don’t believe in love at first sight. I don’t believe in Prince Charmings or fairy tale endings. It’s obvious that neither of us would leave our respectively great jobs and move 3000 miles based off of one good weekend and few months of texting. It’s also obvious that we both felt something strong enough to keep in contact, but not exactly knowing why since we know there’s no real chance of there being an “us”. But yet, we let each other in, and now here I sit, wondering how he’s doing and if I’ve crossed his mind today. I mindlessly attempt to distract myself by using Tinder, but I only end up swiping right on profiles/photos that remind me of him. I go out on dates and constantly compare them to him.
But again, I’m a realist. I know I should just take it for what it was – an amazing weekend – and move on. I know it’s not logical to even entertain the idea of a long-distance relationship without a strong, solid foundation of at least being in the same time zone first. I know that I am suffering from a serious case of like (not love…I’m not that naïve) and this whole geography thing is unfortunately making it too difficult to act on it further. I know that what we have could possibly turn into something, but definitely not at this point and in our lives. And I know that maybe that’s just the way that the cards are meant to fall…
Now if only my realist brain could relay this message to my aching heart.