Relationships take work. We all know that. Most of the time, we expect the other person to do more work because we think we put too much of ourselves into the relationship. There are always two sides to every story, but one of the most important things to realize when you are in a real relationship is that things will not always go your way. We may not know that many times, when we count other people’s flaws, we are blind to our own.
Here are 10 habits you need to break to be a better partner.
1. Always needing to be right
A relationship is not a competition, and you don’t always have to win. Relationships require compromises and negotiations. You have to understand that everyone does not see the world the way you do. What may feel right to you might be wrong for the other. It is about how you find a middle ground instead of making it about just right and wrong. If you focus too much on always being right, you might win the argument but lose the person.
2. Holding on to your ego
This is a hard one but crucial to be a better partner. We all tend to hold our egos high in our lives, and sometimes we prioritize ego so much that we do not see the other person’s point of view. It is essential to stay true to yourself and hold on to your values, but holding on to your ego during serious conversations will only portray an immature version of yourself.
3. Never admitting your mistakes
We see the world through our eyes, and as much as we want others to see our perspective, sometimes we become selfish and want everyone to see things the way we do. We are human, and we make mistakes, but many of us have difficulty apologizing because we are embarrassed to admit our mistakes. It takes a mature individual to say sorry when they realize they were in the wrong.
4. Complaining about your partner too much
It is natural to get upset and want to talk to your friends about everything your partner did wrong, but before running to a friend, take the time to think about how you will sound. If you only share things your partner did wrong with a friend, that is how your friends will see them. Sometimes it is helpful to get an objective opinion from a close friend, but oversharing personal issues will only make them not like your partner.
5. Waiting too long to discuss important issues
Many of us view our partner through rose-colored glasses in the beginning. As you grow to know each other more, you start to notice things you do not like about your partner. No one is perfect. There will always be things you will not like about each other. But important issues like whether or not you want to have children and the importance of religion and politics should be discussed so they do not become a serious issue later.
6. Expecting to adore all your partner’s family members and friends
You are in a relationship with your partner, and you are lucky if you adore all their family members and friends. There may be cases when you cannot stand one aunt or a childhood friend. As long as they are not blatantly rude to you, it would be best if you learned to accept their presence in your life. You do not have to like everyone, but you have to respect each other.
7. Being unwilling to change
People think it’s a bad thing when we change in a relationship, but that is inevitable. We have to grow when we share our lives with someone else, and growth is change. It takes time for many people to realize that. You will have to make some lifestyle changes. Before, it might have been okay to stay the night at anyone’s house, but you have to be respectful of those boundaries and rules you set for each other once you are in a relationship.
8. Never apologizing first
Arguments and fights are inevitable in all relationships. At some point in our lives, our partner will do something to upset us and vice versa. You cannot let one fight determine the course of your relationship. Give each other time and talk to each other. If you consider ending a relationship based on one argument, you will never find a fulfilling relationship. Be the bigger person and say you are sorry.
9. Expecting the relationship to always be exciting
Dating life can be wild with the numerous plans, fun nights, and days spent waiting for texts. You cannot expect a relationship to be filled with something new every day like the movies. The beauty of being with someone long-term is accepting that some days, you won’t do anything, and that is okay. You will be exhausted if you expect every day to be exciting. Being comfortable with someone is having days when you enjoy each other even without doing anything.
10. Always taking relationship advice from single friends
Your single friends are single for a reason. Maybe they haven’t found their person, choose the wrong people, or are not ready to settle down. Your friend will always be on your side and find flaws in your partner when something happens between you two. Your friends who are in relationships will understand the value of compromise much better than your single friends. If you want legit relationship advice, turn to those who have lasted in a relationship.