To The Girl Who Feels Unworthy

I consider myself a positive, encouraging, and overall pretty badass modern woman. I find ways to better myself every day as a human being though any situation I encounter – the good and the bad. I care more about making others smile and finding ways to leave a positive impact in this world and on others than anything else. While it’s one of my greatest strengths, it’s also one of my greatest weaknesses.

For the last year+ I have been navigating the on and off ups and downs of a toxic ”almost-relationship”. I never labeled it or even thought of it as toxic before because outside of the “almost-relationship” aspect, we worked so well as friends. But when it truly came down to it, he had no emotion, no empathy, no respect, nothing. He always kept one foot in one foot out because that meant that no matter what, he would never have to commit. He gave me every answer I needed in order to come to the realization that this was never going to be what I wanted it to be.

But no matter how hard I tried to just move on, I couldn’t. I cared and longed to feel wanted too deeply, but in all the wrong ways.

When I care for someone, I go all in. I don’t have to try or think twice because that’s just who I am and how I love. When I want someone, they know it and they don’t question it. But him? He didn’t have a love language that I would or could ever understand. And at the end of the day, what I’ve come to realize is that that is okay. Sometimes it really is as simple as two people just not being meant for one another. And that is okay.

So no matter the situation – find your center ground, your strength, your courage to stand on your own two feet and not allow anything less than what you know you deserve. Because this? The bare minimum? This is not what you deserve.

You deserve to be adored and cared for in every way that your mind, body, and heart needs and longs for. You deserve to be appreciated in every way you give your love and energy to someone else. You deserve to be taken on extravagant dates, to not feel guilty asking for what you want, to be unapologetically you. To put your foot down and say no more when someone is only willing to give you the bare minimum. You deserve to keep your standards high, because that means you will not allow yourself to settle. You deserve to speak your mind freely and passionately without feeling ashamed or at fault. You deserve to be reminded of how incredible, inspiring, and beautiful you are. You deserve someone who proves their own worth through actions, not words alone.

You deserve the world – remind yourself that no matter the situation, you are more than deserving. You are worthy. You are healing and growing. You are a badass modern woman who will not settle for less than the bare minimum. So, feel the feels, then keep your chin up, put on a smile, and hold your head high. Because that is what you do. You move forward with strength and grace, with courage and conviction, that someday the stars will align in your world. Someday, the heartache, the lessons, the tears, the uncertainty – will all be worth it. But today, tomorrow, and every day following, remind yourself that YOU are your number one priority. YOU are your number one biggest fan. YOU are mighty, and you are worth it.

About the author

Alexa Loebel

Passionate about self-love, resilience, having faith and love always