This week on my MBTI Facebook Page, I asked each type to share a personal epiphany they’d had that had significantly impacted their lives. Here’s what 10 ENFJs had to say about the particular piece of wisdom that turned things around for them.
1. “I’ve realized that part of the reason I’m able to engage and get along with such a wide variety of people is because deep down I’m a ‘people pleaser’ – which has allowed me to understand what makes people tick and how to converse with them in a way that will make them feel understand, and thus, like me in return.”
2. “I realized that many people know me, but very, very few people truly know me–and, when I found myself really known, I can relax and allow myself more time and space to be more introverted.”
3. “To be truly happy you need to live life authentically! You can’t just aim to please other people.”
4. “The world would be much a better place if we are good communicators and listeners. ENFJs have prided themselves as people who will put themselves on the line for the sake of helping others. One of their key strengths is being good listeners. Maybe that is why friends come to us when problems arise. By being there, we are making the world a better place in this simple way…and out friends are thankful for that.”
5. “Learning to communicate my needs, and know and enforce my boundaries, has done more to ensure I have healthy relationships than basically anything else.”
6. “Over the years, I’ve learned that sometimes what people need in order to grow isn’t nurturing from others, but the opportunity to stand on their own two feet and figure things out on their own. It’s hard to let someone do that when you care about them, but it will usually be more rewarding for them in the long run.”
7. “An important thing I’ve come to realize over the years is that you can’t love people into loving you.”
8. “I’m so used to being liked that it was very odd the first time I was in an environment where that didn’t come easily. As it turns out, not every single person I ever meet in my life will like me and I have to make peace with that (as difficult as that may be). There’s only so much people pleasing in my power, and at the end of the day the only person that really has to like me is ME.”
9. “As a perfectionist, I often have to remind myself that ‘Done is better than perfect.’ Someone told me this years ago and I immediately had to print it out on a piece of paper and tape it to my desk above my computer!”
10. “The most important thing I’ve come to realize in life is that your own happiness is not only important – it’s necessary. Empty people have nothing to give away to others!” 
