When you find yourself alone and thinking about the past, about why he left you, why he hurt you, or what changed that caused things to end, don’t ask yourself what could’ve been, think about what is, and what could be.

Don’t question whether the wrong person was right for you, whether you made a mistake and so did he, believe that if he wanted to be in your life, he would be. Don’t look back and see everything that you lost. Instead think of everything that you gained. Think of what the past has taught you and use it to move forward. Use it to let go.

When you find yourself in a room full of people, family, friends, don’t think about how different it would be if he was with you, love the people you surround yourself with, and realize that these are the people who matter. And then realize that he doesn’t.

Don’t think about what he’s doing at this moment when you’re apart. Think about how you’re strong enough to be without him. Think about how you’re finally freed from the grip that held you back, and do not let his absence hold you back even further. Allow his absence to provoke everything in you that will help you to begin again. Allow it to initiate something new, not necessarily with someone, but with yourself. Learn things about yourself that you never thought you could. Explore, and be present when you do.

Don’t continue to think of what could’ve been because you’ll postpone the ability to be happy with yourself. Remember what happiness was like before him, because you have experienced happiness when he wasn’t there, and you can continue to experience it now that he’s gone. Remember that you were someone before you met him, and realize that you’ve grown into the person you are now.

Remember who you are. Remember who you want to be. And when you are finally able to remember who that person is, share it with the world, share it with someone who won’t make you wonder what could’ve been, but will make you content with what is.