I Don’t Want Our Love To Be Comfortable

Listen. I don’t want to be the boring couple. The couple with posed photographs and stereotypical captions. The couple with smiles plastered on our faces. The couple that never argues.

I don’t want to be the couple that always looks put together. The couple whose love appears perfect, or maybe even is perfect, tied up with fancy ribbon and matching Facebook posts. I don’t want to be the couple that’s cute, adorable, #relationshipgoals. The couple that everyone envies (and simultaneously hates) because we look so damn happy.

I don’t want our love to be static, uncomplicated.

I don’t want our love to be comfortable.

I want our love to be messy.

I want us to fight, and fight fiercely. I want our passion to build and bubble into our every interaction and thought. I want us to be complex and difficult, wild and wonderful. Everything love should be. Everything but bland.

I want us to be real.

And real means imperfect. It means all the sh*tty parts of us on display. It means you don’t see me as a flawless princess, but as the stubborn, sassy woman you’re head over heels for. And I don’t see you as this superhero guy, but the annoying, sh*thead you are. My annoying, sh*thead.

I don’t want to be the couple that fits together easily, that falls into routines and patterns without question. The couple that wakes up, kisses each other platonically, and moves on with the day. The couple that says and does all the ‘relationship’ things but doesn’t really feel them.

I want to be the couple that challenges each other’s beliefs, questions each other’s opinions. The couple that doesn’t go to the same restaurant each weekend, but explores. Who sometimes picks date ideas by flipping a coin, or gets in the car without a set destination.

I want us to drive each other crazy, make each other mad, be imperfect and complicated and just a damn mess. But a beautiful mess. Our mess.

I don’t want our love to be comfortable. For us to describe ourselves as fine, good, happy. Life is too short for good, fine, and happy.

I want weird. I want silly. I want a thousand moments and places and tears and laughs and lessons and memories to build from and look back on.

I don’t want to be the perfect couple. The couple smiling on the internet, but under the surface static and unsatisfied. We’re not perfect. And that’s fine because I love us anyways.